It was fun to crack open a little bit of our personal “stuff” last Tuesday for this post about the real $herdog (yes, I’m still patiently waiting for that nickname to catch on) and John’s J-Boom version. And a funny thing happened after sharing those. Not only did they receive over 1,200 amazingly awesome and encouraging comments (note to self: apparently you’re not a social pariah if you admit that you sometimes have strawberry cream cheese on your ear and are inclined to impersonate Cindy Lou Who) but we also got dozens of emails – not even exaggerating – asking about how to deal with criticism and respond to negative comments. And thus this post was born.
I guess by sharing all of our weird idiosyncrasies it encouraged people to write about something they’re struggling with and ask how we handle it? It also could have had something to do with this thread on the $herdog post. Either way, the emails mostly came from folks who run small blogs who have somehow fallen into larger readerships thanks to being pinned on Pinterest or otherwise thrust into the spotlight suddenly (like a feature on Apartment Therapy or Design Sponge). And the general gist of every single email was this: someone was blogging along about whatever they blog about (some of these people aren’t home bloggers at all) and then… zinger… it happened. A not-so-nice comment. And it stung.
With more readers definitely comes more “feedback” – both good and bad. And you know I’m happy to be that spunky little cheerleader on your shoulder shouting high-pitched overly-enthusiastic things like: “you can do it!” and “reach for the stars!” – so here’s my humble advice in a nutshell:
- It’s your blog.
- Be who you are. That is enough.
- Try to give the good feedback as much weight as the bad.
- Do all things with love.
Sounds corny huh? But I’ll explain how those four things have really helped us deal with the whole “you’re putting yourself out there and I’m anonymous so I’m going to tell you exactly how I feel” phenomenon. After all we’ve been told (both nicely and not so nicely) a few of the following things:
- I’m not really interested in posts about _____, so I vote you skip them
- I’m losing interest in big projects – do more little ones
- Do more big projects – the small ones are filler
- I want more Clara and Burger and everyday stuff
- I want less Clara and Burger and everyday stuff
- That paint color/art/room is ugly/not the right choice
- Stop using certain words/expressions because they make me cringe
- Stop being so cheap and spend some money
- Stop spending so much money and be more frugal
- Move faster, I’m bored
- Move slower so I can catch up
- I’m disappointed in this choice/this idea/you
- This blog used to be better because _________
- I will no longer read this blog because ________
See all the contradictions going on in there? Basically if we listened to every suggestion, well, we wouldn’t have a thing to blog about. Not a single thing. And after 2,000+ posts and over four years of doing this, we’ve definitely learned that some folks like things that others hate and some people have an opinion when it comes to how they’d run this blog if it were theirs. But here’s the thing. It’s not theirs.
Which brings us to…
Tip #1: It’s your blog. It might sound weird to point out, but your blog isn’t a magazine with a team of 30 people who poll their readers and try to please the largest group (at least I don’t think it is). The very definition of a blog is just an outlet to write whatever you want and share whatever part of your life that you’re passionate about in your own words and at your own pace and in whatever way feels natural to you. Whether you do it full time or as a hobby once a month, your only real task is to be who you are and share what you like and those who like it will drop in.
In our case, we’re just two people with a dog and a kid who happened to gain a following sharing our adventures on the home front. We just write about whatever’s going on in our lives and seems interesting to us, which has gotten us here (we’re not Facebook or Pinterest, but 5 million hits a month = crazytown to two kids like us). See, if you attempt to please every last commenter, as much as you love and value your readers, know that it’s Mission Impossible – and it could even lead to your blog’s downfall (it won’t be yours anymore). So trust yourself. Everyone else might have an opinion, but your voice really should be the loudest and your vote really should be the one that counts.
Tip #2: Be who you are. That is enough. I think most people are a little guilty of the whole wanting-more syndrome. When a show ends I immediately want the next episode to come on (and I want it to be even better than the last). When I get a magazine and it’s feeling a little thin I wish it were twice as thick. And I think boxes of Oreos should be bottomless (I expect them to refill themselves while I’m sleeping). So it’s no surprise that when it comes to blogging, well, readers are inclined to want more. They might say it not-so-nicely, or very kindly indeed. And either way it might make you feel sort of womp-womp. But it’s just human nature. And I can tell you from experience that you will be a happier person and a better blogger if you make peace with that completely normal phenomenon.
You can’t control how every single person reacts to your blog, but you can control how you blog. And struggling to eke out more to the point of exhaustion or burnout (be it recipes, sewing tips, DIY stuff, photography pointers, craft ideas, or anything else you blog about) just isn’t the answer. At least not if – in the words of Claire Danes in Homeland – you’re playing the long game. Ideally your method of blogging should make you feel more inspired, creative, and enthusiastic about blogging – which in turn will shine through so your readers get just as giddy about it as you do. There’s a reason that your blog is attracting a readership and people are coming back. So just go at your own pace and concentrate on doing things well and not making yourself sick or neglecting your family because a few usually very well-intentioned folks want something that should take ten days to be done, photographed, and blogged about in five. Forgive people for being excited and impatient. We all do it.
Of course establishing these boundaries applies to other scenarios too, so if you have a family blog and folks want more photos/info about your kids than you’re comfortable sharing, know that whatever you want to share = enough. In blogging I generally think if it feels wrong (or makes you feel tired/sad/uninspired), it’s wrong. So don’t do it. As much as I hate being told to relax (seriously, ask John, it’s on his “do not ever say that to me unless you want me to go crazy on you” list), just try to relax and do your thing.
Tip #3: Try To Give The Good Feedback As Much Weight As The Bad. The funny thing is that everyone we talk to who is wrestling with comment criticism admits they still get waaaaay more positive comments than negative ones. I mean the ratio is usually astounding. We know it just takes one cutting comment to get under your skin, but when the vast majority of people love something, it sucks to let one commenter sink your battleship. Let’s do some light math (I don’t do heavy math, but light math is ok). If over the course of a week or two, 99 people take the time to say they like your blog/post/project/house/whatever and one person chimes in to say something’s not their cup of tea, that still adds up to a 99% success rate. And those are good odds my friend- so keep on keeping on! Heck, even if a ton of your readers don’t like something but you like it, I wholeheartedly think that you should keep blogging about it. Why? Because you like it and – once again, for the folks in the back – it’s your blog. Picture me up stage wearing a pant suit and a pocket protector saying “I can’t hear you!” and holding the mic out so you can shout that chorus with me. Or dancing around in this outfit chanting it with my lovely family while serving up a heaping portion of jazz hands (Burger’s clearly hiding because he doesn’t want to be seen in this getup).
Tip #4: Do everything with love. It’s admittedly extremely cheesy (and you might hear a tiny violin playing in the background) but my favorite advice is usually summed up in that phrase. It’s actually written on a post-it note that I’ve had stuck to my laptop for the longest time. When someone takes time out of their day to say something they’d most likely never say to anyone’s face (or would they…?) I’ve come to realize that spewing the same venom that they flung in my direction won’t make me feel any better (heck, it would probably make me feel significantly worse).
So I try to look at them from a place of love. Maybe they’ve had a terrible day. Maybe they’ve lost someone they love very much and they’re hurting. It may seem weird to try to have compassion for those who don’t seem to be very sensitive to your feelings, but I’m telling you that there’s something to it. It helps me respond with humor or a quick explanation from my point of view without getting too heated. Or even just with the words “Merry Christmas to you and your family!” like I did when someone said that decorating our family Christmas tree with paint chips was akin to decorating it with tampon wrappers. Growing up my mom always said that above being successful, popular, or athletic (all the things I worried about so much back then), being kind was the most important thing. And that’s something I’d love to pass down to Clara. Sing it with me: all ya need is love.
So there it is. My brain dump. I hope it helps at least one or two of you out there who might be struggling with growing and having more eyes on you. I know it sounds corny, but for us this blog is just about sharing our adventures and hopefully helping you guys along the way. That’s why we make videos about grouting and cabinet painting and take so many photos and share every last detail – in the hope of helping a handful of you guys at home. And it’s also why we love sharing behind the scenes blogging stuff like this (since so many of you are fellow bloggers these days). I am completely embarrassed to admit this, but we wrote the Thank You part of our book a few weeks ago, and it wasn’t the part about our family and friends that made me cry, it was the part about you, our lovely readers. Crying isn’t even the word. It wasn’t cute. I was weeping. There was smeared mascara and a runny nose. The whole nine yards.
The enthusiasm, sweetness, and support that you folks send our way is nothing less than life-changing. I really mean that. The least we can do is crack open a little bit of ourselves in beyond-DIY posts like this from time to time (every once in a while we get the itch to overshare, like this and this along with our more recent J-Boom and $herdog posts). So lets get all sappy and share mom and dad quotes in the comments. Or any other older and wiser family member who said something while you were growing up that rings oh so true to you. My mom was also famous for saying “always wear nice underwear in case you end up in the emergency room” throughout my formative years. And let me tell you, she was right on the money about that too. It’s waaaaaaaay too embarrassing to go into, but I didn’t follow her advice and I royally regretted it. There were Care Bears involved. And I was 21. And I don’t think the doc grasped the concept of ironic underwear. I’ll leave the rest up to your imagination.
Update – Some of the most frequent requests that we get are for info about professionally blogging (how we made our site, how we grew our following, how we make money, etc) so we shared all of the details about how we started a blog, grew our traffic, and turned it into a full time job.
Shantel says
I loved this. I definitely needed to hear this today – not for my blog… but for my life. I love your blog – although I don’t comment frequently.
Thank you!
Vanessa says
My mom totally said the same thing about the underwear. As a kid I always thought it was bizarre, but now I totally get it. My husband and I adore your blog and how down-to-earth and real you guys are, keep it up!
Sally says
Great post. I think they apply to lots of other situations too. I particularly like how you described your last tip.
Everyone wants to be our best selves, but we don’t always live up to it. I strive to forgive others rudeness so that they can respond with love when I’m having a bad day.
In my professional life, I’m often in situations where it is easlier to criticize than to praise. Recognizing that, I try to be intentional in giving positive feedback to my co-workers. Based on a friend’s suggestion, I’ve started tagging e-mails where someone gives me positive feedback. I haven’t looked back at them yet, but I know they are there if I need a boost someday!
Your blog works for me, so I’m a grateful reader!
Sally says
BTW, did y’all watch last night’s Parks and Rec where Leslie focuses on the one voter who doesn’t like her?
YoungHouseLove says
Not yet, it’s in our DVR waiting for us though. Maybe this weekend!
-John
YoungHouseLove says
Aw, I love the idea of tagging those emails! So smart.
xo,
s
jeannette says
not spam. p.p.s.
http://www.vadisturner.com/mixedmedia.html
YoungHouseLove says
Awesome!
xo,
s
rachael says
This is a great post, your blog is very inspirational. I discovered your blog a year ago while I was on maternity leave, and it honestly changed my life! It was the first blog I ever read, I don’t even know how I stumbled upon it but it made me realize that we could totally fix up our fixer-upper without breaking the bank. Because of your blog I discovered a new interest in decorating, DIY’ing, and instead of watching tv while my baby napped all day I got up, and built stuff. Re-organized my closets. Painted all the dark trim. I now clean my kitchen every night before I go to bed!! It sounds so silly to write that someone I never met changed my life, but I’m living proof!! So forget those debbie downers! PS.Have you seen the Debbie Downer SNL? SOO FUNNY!
YoungHouseLove says
We love the one where Rachel Dratch is cracking up (with Lindsay Lohan in it). I believe the line “Did you know feline AIDS is the number one killer of domestic cats?” said through cry-laughing. Followed by a Debbie Downer-ish “Meow Meow.”
-John
Helen and The Fox says
Your blog rocks and I am so happy you both get to do what you love. My Mom always said “If you don’t have anything nice to say don’t say anything at all.” This was usually said to break up back seat fighting. Hahaha!
Lisa says
My dad always reminded me, especially when I was in a whiny/complaining mood, that “Life isn’t fair.” I think of that every time I want to complain, because chances are whatever is happening in my life that I think is so unfair, bad, etc. is still better than what someone else is going through. My grandmother, his mother, loved to say, “It is what it is,” which is sort of a motto for an over-analyzer like me. We can’t change everything – sometimes ya just gotta deal with what you’ve got, make the best of it, and move on!
Hannah says
Some people are just plain haters! Even in real life, there’s always those girls (sorry but it usually is us girls) that talk crap about any other girl that they see.
Once I was at work and a coworker was talking crap about a new girl who she didn’t even KNOW! It’s funny because it’s always the same people, talking about other people to make themselves feel better.
Same thing with the internet, bitter women. I just feel bad for them…
You guys are the cutest and handiest darn couple! Clara is the cutest and smartest baby ever. (I saw that youtube video of her singing the top hits. Seriously, John just named off numerous songs and she started singing it, I don’t think my neice could ever recognize that many and she’s older than Clara!) Burger is pretty handsome himself, and his snuggling under the covers video is the top viewed on your guys’ channel. Hilarious.
Hope you guys have a wonderful weekend!
Katie N. says
My dad always said/says, “Do it right the first time, or do it again!” What I love about this is that is applies to EV-E-RY-THING – sports, school work, projects around the house, and even just the way you live your life day to day. It is one of those sayings that I hear over and over again in my head whenever I am faced with doing something that I’m not exactly wanting to spend time/care on.
Now that I’m married, my husband always says, “The thing that makes us different is that we do the things that are difficult to do.” Meaning, we don’t take the easy way out. So, when we REALLY don’t feel like going to that event but it will mean so much to the friends who are hosting, or we are going through something rough at work and have to make a choice, or whatever the scenario may be, we do what is the right thing to do, not just what is easy. I can see how this phrase will someday become the phrase our kids will repeat when they’re asked what advice their parents gave them. And that makes me smile :)
Faith says
I think it is great to give tips for how to handle criticism. I never think people should be unkind or intentionally hurtful in their comments. However, you should realize, (and I’m sure you do to an extent) but it didn’t totally come across in this post, that your blog is a major source of your income and you are getting paid for people reading and commenting on it. So, it is not fair to only want, expect, or tolerate positive, uncritical comments. One reason people enjoy blogs is because they provide a forum for readers to express their ideas. Unlike a magazine, they can say what they like and what they don’t like. They can express how they would do it differently. They can give anecdotes about their own experiences. It is natural for readers to tell you…I like this idea, but that other project I didn’t so much care for. If you are only looking for pat-on-the-back comments, maybe you should make your readership private and open only to those whose comments you enjoy reading.
I also understand the part about “Its Your Blog and Be Who You Are” however, many monetized blogs actually take polls of their readership to find out what they would like to read/see more of…the types of projects they like more than others, the things that make them keep coming back day after day. If you discount and make light of your readers’ opinions – it’s an insult to your readers and eventually you will lose readership.
I own my own business – it is not a blog. While I certainly hate negative feedback when I feel like my staff and I have done our very best, I understand that it is part of the business. When I hear things that clients could see being done in a different way…I take those comments seriously and don’t say “well, it’s my business and I’ll do what I want.” I don’t think you say that either, but it comes across that way to me in this post. My point is, if you are getting paid for any job, it’s not all about you…it is about the customer. And as long as people are coming to your blog…and you are making enough money to classify it as your job…the customer’s opinion, good or bad, counts.
YoungHouseLove says
We definitely can appreciate that not everyone has the same opinions! To each his own is one of our favorite sayings! This is just a post about how we try not to react too severely and let criticism get us down so we can continue to blog in a happy upbeat way that makes us most excited to continue sharing (which seems to be the key to our blog’s growth and other people’s enthusiasm – at least in our humble experience). Hopefully anyone who reads those last two paragraphs knows that we love our readers more than words can say. We just can’t let everyone else control how we blog because it wouldn’t feel authentic (especially since everyone has different opinions, so we’re not even sure how that would work). Unlike providing a paid service or product, folks who don’t like this blog just won’t read it (it’s 100% optional and free) – so of course if we were selling something and someone was unhappy it would be a different story. But if our “job” as bloggers is just to share what’s going on in our house (which is the only “formula” we’ve ever had) and that has gotten us here, we just have to follow our hearts and keep doing that! Hope that makes sense.
xo,
s
Casey Cope says
I think that’s a fair opinion, Faith. But if I may, I’d like to point out the other side of the coin as I see it. I don’t think you’re giving J&S appropriate credit for how they manage their business. Their methodology is clearly working as their readership and opportunities are growing. In addition, I would bet many tweaks (YHLife and blog navigation, for example) are built off customer requests. I don’t think it’s fair to assume that just because they don’t divulge all business tactics means they don’t recognize that reader = revenue and change tactics to accommodate their audience. Granted, we interpreted this post very differently as I did not get the impression they devalued negative opinions. I perceived the purpose to be an advice column of sorts for new bloggers. But just like design, we can all feel differently about things and I truly believe you are entitled to that opinion and presented it respectfully. J&S have different tastes than me. However, as a heavy contributor of their 5 million hits, I choose to still read because I can appreciate their style, tutorials, and overall attitude. Consider me a happy customer. :)
YoungHouseLove says
Thanks Casey! We actually do base a lot of coding tweaks and website layout/function changes off of reader requests and even write posts based on reader suggestions (this post itself was spawned by many readers asking us about this subject) so we love and value opinions and suggestions! It’s just hard to take conflicting requests like “more big projects – the small ones don’t interest me” and “more smaller projects because the big ones overwhelm me” to heart since we figure whatever we’re doing in our home is our content. We can’t really remodel our house based on reader demand, you know? We just do what’s on our to-do list according to our priorities and our available income and document our journey for all to see. Trying to conform to every conflicting opinion would not only be confusing, it might just result in an inauthentic muddled mess. So we’ve been reminding ourselves for years that you can’t please all of the people all of the time, but staying true to whatever feels the most natural to us seems to work well when it comes to blogging (and life, I guess). Hope that makes sense.
xo,
s
Faith says
I’m not saying anyone is an unhappy customer. Obviously what YHL is doing works for them and their readership and sometimes for me too. I was reacting to how this post was written- in essence, giving advice to other bloggers that may not actually reflect all of their “business tactics” that you mention. To be frank, it bugs me that monetized blogs will boldly say- we do this for us, if you don’t like it then don’t read it, we don’t care if you don’t like how, when, what we post. It seems like any comment that alludes to anything other than a compliment gets flagged as negative! The correct attitude to any comment within reason should be “Thank you for commenting on our blog, thank you for your business, we use your hits and your comments on our website to show advertisers we are worth x number of dollars every month. I’m all for writing about what you love and believe in and getting paid for it! But I also believe that you have to respect people and their opinions and you seem to feel entitled to only get positive feedback. Like I said before, if you are getting paid for it you do care what your readers think/expect/want because you want them to keep coming back. I just don’t understand how people can’t post their opinion without it being called negative. That’s huge ego to say if someone doesn’t like what you like they are being negative.
YoungHouseLove says
I definitely appreciate that you have a different opinion Faith! That’s what makes the world go ’round! I don’t know how else to say how much we love/value our readers and all that they have to say – we truly adore everyone who stops by our little slice of the internet and completely appreciate that everyone has different opinions – that’s what makes life (and design) interesting! That’s why we post critical comments for all to see and try to respond to them all with love (how boring would a blog be if only “I love everything you’re doing” comments were shared?). This is just a post about how we handle conflicting blog advice and truly negative non-constructive comments, which I’m sure every company on Earth receives. In the end, I’d imagine every business (and person) just has to weigh what works best for them since they can’t please everyone all of the time (essentially, even if they stand to make money from one person by changing their practices it could turn off another person resulting in the loss of that person’s business). For us to try to change the way we blog to suit to every comment suggestion (especially since some of them are direct opposites) would weaken our blog/business/happiness – so we just do what works for us. Which thankfully also seems to positively influence our “company” (it seems to make our readers as a whole – and ourselves – the happiest) and our blog continues to grow! Hope that makes sense.
xo,
s
MamaJ says
Haters gonna hate! Ha!
Erin C. says
You guys are great in my book. I am glad you can be so positive in the face of criticism. Blog on, Petersiks! You inspire me.
Alexandria Lane-Detwiler says
There is a special place in hell for women who don’t help other women.” Madeliene K. Albright.”
I truly belive this. Some women make a sport of tearing other women down. Its sad, and it shows their unwillingness to evolve and their obvious jealousy. Ladies with class see the brighter side of things, and your blog has a lot of classy ladies reading it daily. I respect you candid approach!! I love your integrity & your sincere words. Lets all leave negative nancy, petty patty, and miserable martha in the dust. I love your blog. I read it every chance I get. I find it to be a positive ray of light in what can be a somewhat blah day. We are flipping our house– slowly but surely– and you guys give us hope & faith that we can do it all!! Love to you guys for having a masters in AWESOME–NESS ( thats not a word- but today it will be!!)
Thanks for being YOU!
-Alexandria
EngineerMom says
Amen, sista!
TheFrugalGirl recently wrote something similar about how to handle negative comments. Her approach is similar to yours, and I admire both blogs for that.
Keep on keepin’ on.
Lindsey says
Best Advice I always make a point to live by: Karma is in your hands. What you give of yourself will be returned, though it may not be today or tomorrow, it will always come back.
Lessie says
“Growing up my mom always said that above being successful, popular, or athletic (all the things I worried about so much back then), being kind was the most important thing. And that’s something I’d love to pass down to Clara. Sing it with me: all ya need is love.”
Thanks! Great inspiration!
Marie-Ange says
Keep on bloging exactly the way you’re doing, it comes from your heart, and it shows when reading it. I think the blog’s perfect!
PS: you made me laugh about your mom’s quote about your undies, mine always said the exact same thing (though I don’t have a story about emergency yet…)!
Caity says
Jumping in on the lovefest…you guys are awesome. 10:00 and 2:00 (roughly) are the best times of my workday because I get to read new posts! Your writing is great, you guys are personable and polite, and you’re so easy to relate to! Thanks for keeping it real and sharing your lives with all of us! You are loved!
Erika says
I’m sure someone has already said this above, but I am speed reading during toddler nap time- this is just like the show Parks and Recreation from last night and I am just laughing my head off at how easy it is to fixate on that one thing someone says. It’s like those people that can never grow up or deal with life because of one comment a parent/teacher/friend said once when they were young.
I love your blog and the projects you do. Even though our taste is not exactly the same I can see where your ideas can be tweaked to meet my needs, so why bother you with criticism about things like that? I think people have way too much time on your hands and I LOVE how you all handle what comes your way. Keep being yourselves, please! And, who cares about that itty-bitty percent of folks that, let’s face it, can NEVER be pleased.
Peace Out, $herdog and J-Boom!
Beth C says
Great post. Thank you so much, Sherry. You’re awesome.
Hillary says
I have a small (like, tiny) blog and I’ve gotten two or three negative comments that have REALLY gotten under my skin—like, I’ve been completely fixated on them for days at a time. I love your tips, and number 1 has been my biggest go-to reminder: I write my blog for me–not for anyone else, but for ME. Thanks for being honest!
Ash says
Your awesome attitude and optimism in dealing with criticism (or even well-meant, but kind of mean comments) is so helpful. It’s great advice for not just bloggers, but for everyone going about their daily lives. Thanks for being so sweet!
PS: Those pictures of Clara and Burger (and John!) are absolutely adorable. They can’t help but put a smile on your face!
Victoria says
Thanks for this post. I just had a real-life run in that was less than pleasant and it was still doing that instant replay loop in my mind. Reading this help me put it into perspective and remember that it’s all about kindness, regardless of what someone else chooses to display. And because of this post, I also could remember that on the same day that I was feeling crummy, two separate people did/said nice things to me also, but I had been so stuck on the unpleasant encounter that I was missing out on the bright side. Thanks so much.
jbhat says
You guys are wise beyond your years (even though I know you are getting on up there, haha). I love your blog because of all the things you say and do. If it was just all here’s how to grout–why, I could get that from a manual. It’s nice to get to know YOU! And to see and read about how and why you do what you do. What’s more, you are patient and kind and thoughtful and smart and funny and good looking. I wish I knew you in real life, cream cheese smears and all.
My mom’s advice: Stand up straight! Floss! Don’t sit so close to the TV!
My dad’s advice: Introduce yourself! Take your vitamins! Read the directions first!
xo
jbhat
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- I love both of your parents’ advice! Awesome.
xo,
s
Sandy Rim says
Good Lord, you’re explantation was too long, make it shorter!
;oP
Hehe…
You guys are fantabulous!
Jane says
I want you guys to know that not only do I check your blog every single day, but I check it twice a day, because it’s just that awesome! Even if what you guys are up to has nothing to do with my life at all, I just love reading your posts because they are fun, funny and just plain enjoyable! I popped over to the nest cause I had to see what the deal was, and I was absolutely blown away by how obnoxious people can be. It’s a blog people! No one is forcing you to read it! Anyway, that you for the amazing work you do – it makes my work day sooo much better!
ps. Is it weird that I saw a ceramic animal at a thrift shop and almost bought it for you guys? yeah…its a little weird :)
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- not weird at all! I love it. Thanks Jane.
xo,
s
Joy says
Those who drink Hater-ade are clearly unable to appreciate the inspirational cocktail of honesty, humor, and talent that your blog serves up! I read YHL religiously, and just want to say thank you for being such a happy part of my day :)
Crystal says
Love this post. I remember my first negative comment, It really upset me for days. But you can’t please EVERYONE so focus on yourself and family. You guys are doing a great job!
Ofelia, México City says
Bravo! Me encanta este post. Lidiar con la crítica es difícil, pero hacerlo del modo que ustedes lo hacen definitivamente es señal de madurez y gran carácter. POr otro lado, quiero decir que el encanto de Young House Love es, precisamente, su individualidad, el hecho de no pretender complacer a quien lo lee sino a sí mismos, a ustedes tres, cuatro si incluimos a Burger. Nosotros, los lectores, definitivamente, tenemos la opción de si no nos gusta, no leerlo o leerlo y manifestar que no nos gustó por las razones que sean. Sin embargo, volcar una serie de comentarios anónimos o no, con la intención de descalificar su trabajo es señal, sin duda, de mala voluntad o falta de consideración, por decir lo menos. So, go ahead and get fun!
Sara says
People are such cowards online! It was recently “Be Nice On The Internet Day” but I wish that were everyday. I edit a news website and I’m just blown away by how angry and mean people are — and I’m not even writing about my own life! My general rules are 1) I’ll never post anything unless it’s something I would post with my full name (I don’t ever use my full name for privacy reasons but if it’s the kind of sentiment that I would not want traced back to me, I click away) and 2) I’ll never post anything I wouldn’t say directly to someone’s face. Just be nice!
Also, you guys totally rule and I applaud your bravery for putting your life online for our entertainment and joy! Don’t let the haters bring you down.
Blair r says
I just wanted to say, thank you so much for this blog, and spilling all the details on how-tos. We just bought a house and I have referred to your blog more times than I can count when we were buying caulking, tools, and etc. You guys are like my go to reference. Your blog has really given me confidence, that even though my husband I have never painted a room, we can totally DIY almost anything in our new house. I refer to your blog so much, that once when I told my husband I liked something that you guys did and I wanted to do it in our house, he said to me, “Do you really like it, or is it just because John and Sherry liked it?” Apparantly, he thinks I’m obsessed with you guys . Lol I reassured him, that I really liked it, and that you guys just know everything! ;)
YoungHouseLove says
Haha, you’re so sweet Blair!
xo,
s
Janelle D says
$herdog: HATERZZZ GON HATE. If someone doesn’t approve of what you’re doing/the colors you choose/what you put on your tree/what you let your baby play with/what kind of toothpaste you use… etc. they can (and should) quite simply stop reading. We love your blog just the way it is. YHL <3
Robin says
I don’t know why I decided to torture myself by clicking over to that other blog (and I didn’t even stay very long!), but I love you guys! I may not ‘like’ everything, but I ‘love’ that you’re normal people who are just honest about your likes/dislikes and are willing to be yourselves! I’m also sure you’d walk into my house and think ‘what in the world!’ But you inspire me to look at things in a new way and to give something a try. I can’t wait to get my own home (hopefully in 2 1/2years (the countdown is on!)) and then I can actually funnel some of this inspiration towards something my landlord currently won’t allow!! Thanks for the honesty! Thanks for being real! Thanks for not pandering to the conflicting masses!! (I also LOVE the puns and nicknames and fun colors and so much about you guys)
Ellen says
It has never even occurred to me that negative comments even existed on blogs! I can’t even wrap my mind around what would make someone take the time to post a nasty comment on a complete stranger’s blog. The last time I checked blog reading is a completely voluntary activity, so why are these crazy people still reading it if they’re so dissatisfied?
Christina W. says
I dunno, I feel like sometimes some criticism is ok because, what if I looked terrible in a dress but all my friends kept telling me how awesome it looked? I’d definitely want someone to say “Good lord, no” eventually. I can for sure see your point about criticism being given in a kind way, while keeping in mind that it’s not *our* house etc, but sometimes kind criticism gets lumped in with the jerks just because it may not be what you want to hear or agree with. For instance, I totally love you guys and your home(s) and I think your kitchen looks amazing, but I have been avoiding saying that I think the wall color looks a little too yellowy in an unflattering way against all that white because I didn’t want to be painted as a hater. :( Well, that and also because I think the brown floor you are going to put in will ground it and I’m reserving judgement until then!
Kelly says
Great post. I think the fact that you guys so successfully convey your personalities, and just your happy circumstances, make some people really feel the need to get out a pin and pop your balloon. (Which again, just comes down to a lack of something in their own lives.)
On my old blog, I once did a post complaining about the lack of clean-lined, modern sofas at big box furniture stores. I was kinda snarky about those big, puffy things with recliners built in. And I got the most awful comment, a woman saying that my husband should divorce me, because I won’t let him relax on a comfy couch! It was one of my first-ever comments, and I felt horrible and ashamed for days. Luckily, I’m wiser now. (Kinda.)
Julie says
(a) You guys are awesome (all four of you) don’t ever change.
(b) I don’t know why I’m focusing on the underpants story, but that is GREAT ADVICE. I was in a bad car accident in college on laundry day. Except laundry day for me usually means I’ve run out of all my comfy underpants and have to dig to the back of the drawer to the weird lacy see-through thongs that I never wear and am not quite sure how I acquired. So imagine my horror when the EMTs had to cut off my jeans and I was lying there on the gurney for all the world to see my bum. Eeks!
YoungHouseLove says
Oh man- that would totally happen to me. So glad you’re ok!
xo,
s
Dinka says
If it helps at all, I only read one blog religiously and it is yours. You are awesome, so please keep it up! :-)
michelle@decorandthedog says
Great post! Blogland is such a funny little world sometimes.
I think most people rag on you all because they are extremely jealous. You’re both pretty people with a cute kid, cute house, cute dog, and you get to make a living do what you love. That’s hard for some people. So instead of figuring out how they can “have it all” (or just stop reading your blog if they dislike you all so much)..they leave hateful anonymous comments. Good work mean people.
Keep doing your thang!
Emily says
I have been reading your blog for months now and am excited for Mondays when mostly people dread them because I know there will be new blog posts to read–seriously. I usually only comment on the giveaway posts but I just had to say Thanks and I love your blog and the last few sentences of this post about the carebear underwear when 21 at the doctors made me laugh out loud and it hasn’t been the best day so thanks again!!
YoungHouseLove says
Aw, you’re welcome Emily.
xo,
s
Ariella says
What an awesome post. And it’s so needed so badly in today’s society where people feel they can just be jerks because they sit behind a computer. Personally, I have a no asshole rule on my blog for commenting. If you can say something negative in a nice and intelligent way, I’ll approve your comment. But if you’re comment is just rude and offensive, I’ll decline it. As a reporter in my outside blog life, I firmly believe in freedom of speech, but I don’t believe in freedom to be an asshole. You don’t have to agree with me, but you will voice your opinion in a civil, intelligent and respectful manner on my blog. It’s definitely a form of censorship, I admit, but hey, it’s my blog, right?
Thank you so much for sharing this and for the reminder. All writers and creative people that put themselves out there every day need something like this.
Melissa says
Oh man. This really hit home for me today after getting some negative comments on Apartment Therapy yesterday. Was such a downer but it’s nice to have an arsenal of ideas for how to get past it. Thanks for your inspiration!!!!
YoungHouseLove says
Aw, so sorry about that Melissa! Glad to help in some little way. We still look dreamily at your hood post! You’re an inspiration!
xo,
s
Mallory says
Haters are gonna hate. You guys are fabulous and adorable and I love your blog and Clara!
Diane says
Again… your blog MAKES.ME.SMILE!
YoungHouseLove says
Aw thanks Diane. That made me smile.
xo,
s
Sheila says
I love you guys !!! Thanks to you I am no longer afraid of spray paint and it has been glorious ! My husband thinks I am nuts !! Keep up the great work !
Jill says
My comments are not as cute or witty as some others, but I just have to say – I love you guys. You make my day, every day. Thanks you for being you and doing all things with love. (And the rest, too)
Sarah says
I was a little disgruntled by this news. I don’t know why anyone would feel they have the right to tell you how to live and blog your life. I didn’t think it was possible for anyone to dislike Burger/Clara stuff. They are the business. The whole P-money clan (I tried my hand at ironic gangster like $herdog) rocks my socks. I think y’all are awesome. I hope you never alter the way you do things unless you want to. If John decides he wants to join a jazz tap class and Sherry wants to make bras for over sized men I will still read you guys.
Stay awesome,
Sarah.
YoungHouseLove says
Haha P-Money does have a nice ring to it. I like it…
xo,
s
Jackie says
I have two issues with your family and your blog
1. I’ll probably never meet you or get to see your home in person.
2. You don’t post often enough! Sometimes I feel like I check your blog a million times a day just in case there’s anything new!
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- you never know, you might run into us someday! We like a good road trip…
xo,
s
Christin says
Thanks so much for sharing this, and all that you do. I think this blog, and all you who run it, is/are FABULOUS! I don’t get people who say mean comments on blogs. Everything is subjective. If you don’t like something, that’s fine, then you don’t have to do that in your home. But this is your blog and your family and your home. You do and post whatever you damn well please. I don’t always see a project as something that’s good for me, but that’s ok. I still love your vision and creativity behind it. I am ALWAYS inspired by your work, devotion to your family and this blog, and your creativity. By the way, your kitchen is looking amazing and I can’t wait until your book comes out!!
Marilyn says
How lucky we are to have such great role models. Thank you for sharing your lives with us.