This post was 3,000 words long. They all felt overly complicated and heavy and weird. I clicked delete. Then I just typed what we’re really feeling, complete with things we’ve never said out loud and even a few things we’ve never fully admitted to ourselves before.
The truth is that we love you guys. Like for real. Even for the tough love. We know you say it because you care (or hopefully you did at some point), and we want you to know we care right back. We want to do a good job. We want to do this with joy and excitement. We want to inspire you. We know this is an incredible way to have made a living and we are full of gratitude for the experience to have shared the last seven years of our lives with you guys online.
We would NEVER be here without you, and not a day goes by that we don’t know that. It’s why we asked for your feedback last week and read every last comment. We appreciate the honesty and the passion you guys have on the topic of making this blog great. And we agree with a lot of what was being said. We have been feeling off for a while – like we have lost our rhythm and we’re somehow missing the mark for ourselves and for you guys. We too miss the good old days when we did this for the love and were full of such obvious joy and spontaneity. This felt like a place we all hung out and it just doesn’t have that vibe anymore.
Over the years many amazing opportunities popped up for us. Things we never dreamed of doing in a million years, and things we’re incredibly grateful to have had the chance to experience. A book deal, curating paint picks with Benjamin Moore, a line sold at Target, a showhouse, etc. But in hindsight those things also made this feel a lot more like a business than a personal blog to many of you, and to us as well. We have actually ramped those down behind the scenes in an attempt to get back to our roots (we no longer do the BM color collection, the second book is mostly written, our products at Target have completed their run, and we finished the showhouse) but we never really made a big announcement about that – so it’s completely understandable that some of you might think we’ve moved on to those greener pastures and left the blog in the dust, so to speak. The reality is that our site propels the success of any outside project like a product or book, so we could never turn our backs on the blog and expect those items to continue to sell as well.
Not only have we felt this shift from “John and Sherry” to “Young House Love: The Brand”, but the blogosphere as a whole has become increasingly sponsored/corporate lately. We can see from the outside prospective as a reader, or even a fellow blogger, that it’s hard to read a blog post without suspecting some ulterior motive or money-making system behind it. Last week a few of you mentioned that we might need to keep giveaways around because they pay us well, which surprised us since they’re never something we accept payment for (we like to pass free things along to you as a thank you for reading).
Along with the whole business/brand thing that’s going on, and the side gigs that felt like they muddied the water for some of you, there are certainly other things we wish we had handled differently in hindsight. Just to name a few, there’s: being too defensive, over-explaining, letting things get in our heads and change our lighthearted approach, and the internal struggle between being transparent and oversharing personal details like a vacant new house without an alarm system (looking back we wish we’d handled our third house announcement differently). We know many of you felt insulted that we didn’t share more freely about that house, and we truly apologize.
Anyway, back to that whole “we’re sexy stumbling and you know it” thing. It’s endlessly frustrating to do a job that you love poorly, especially when it’s a blog baby that you’ve birthed yourself and nurtured for seven years. And especially when it’s such an amazing job that we once felt so inspired and joyful to wake up and do each day. What’s wrong with us? We know this is a dream job. We acknowledge it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity. We know most people who have built something like this would be more inspired than ever. It’s not that we lost the gratitude, I think it’s that we feel like we’ve fallen out of our groove. We feel like we’re letting you guys down repeatedly. It got to the point that every time we pressed “publish” we braced ourselves.
So in an attempt to stop stumbling around and feeling like we just can’t get it back, we’re taking a break. We don’t know exactly how long we’ll be stepping away, but our guess would be at least a month. We will certainly be exploring other options for supporting our family (something we mentioned we were considering back in April). We had that fiery blog-spark back when we had day jobs and did this as a hobby, so we think it could be a good change. We’ll also be taking a break on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, but the blog will stay public so you guys can access the archives whenever you’d like.
Our internal struggle and the state of this blog is entirely of our making, and we completely own that. Please don’t get mad at anyone for being honest with their feedback last week or accuse them of sending us packing. We have been struggling with that “something is off” feeling for a while now, and after way too much denial and “we’ll turn it around” pep talks, we finally asked for your feedback because we truly wanted to hear what you were thinking. It was cathartic and helpful for us. It has allowed us to very clearly see that if we have any respect for this blog and our love of it, and for you guys and what you’d like to see, we need to take a break if we ever want any hope of getting back to that fun/real/spontaneous place it used to be when this was something we did for the love instead of the high stakes game of supporting a family.
In summary: we love you, we thank you, and we hope you understand.
Diana says
LOVE you guys! Take the break – you don’t have to answer to anybody. It’s your life, we’ve just enjoyed the journey with you and I’m sure there’s lots of people like me who feel they’ll be losing a friend :)
One idea I just had, and maybe it’s already been said by someone else, but you could let other families take over the blog for a week each (with you guys overseeing) as they share the renovation or update of part or all of their house or holiday home, etc. That way us YHL junkies get our fix, the blog keeps going and others can use it as a great place to share their space and ideas. As long as there’s a post here or there from you guys (we all love you!) I think it could keep blog readers and your bank manager happy. Who knows, maybe it’d give you inspiration for something else yourselves and you’ll get caught up in other peoples passion and get the spark back?
Whatever you do, good luck. I’ll be popping back to see what is happening :) XXX
Kristi says
I am another loooongtime (but mostly silent) reader coming out of the woodwork to say that you have never let me down and your blog is ALWAYS a bright spot in my day. I will be here when/if you return to the blogosphere.
Also, I agree wholeheartedly with Deb G., selection bias is real so don’t let it fool you. You are loved, nay, adored by millions. Also, if you need a theme song to inspire you in the next month I suggest the new T Swift song. Shake it off my friends!
Christa says
Lots of comments already, but I feel compelled to add one more! I never comment (bad reader I know!), but I’ve been a faithful reader for probably 6 years now. Sure things changed from the early days, but that’s only natural! Your first kitchen opened my unstylish eyes to a style I loved, and inspired me to redecorate our home. It became bright and beautiful, a place we loved and found relaxing, and helped it sell in one showing when it was time to upgrade!
I’ve been so inspired through the years and have loved watching your family grow. Thank you for sharing with us! All the best in whatever the future holds!
Krys72599 says
Haven’t noticed even one post that wasn’t up to par but you can rest assured I’ll be here when (if?) you get back. And I sure hope you come back!!!!
Meghan says
I just wanted to write and say that I will miss you guys. I have been a reader for the past couple of years. I am originally from Richmond and reading your blog is kind of like a link to my hometown.
I think you guys do an excellent job at your job, I’ve alway thought it was so great that this is your actual job. My husband and I have two kids (4 1/2 and 1) and we both work full time jobs. Its so hard and weekends are even harder trying to spend quality family time and find time to do projects around the house along with all of the necessary chores. Before kids we renovated our first home in RIC and while we don’t get to do many projects these days your blog has always been inspiring. I’m not sure how you have managed to balance having kids at home while doing all of these projects and writing posts. And now with two kids…I think you’ve done an AMAZING job. I think its great you all are taking some time to reflect on the past 7 years but I hope you will be back, blogging soon. But I hope you also enjoy this time with your children, I’m sure you know all to well by now that time flies by even faster with two kids. My youngest is turning one on Friday. People keep asking if I’m excited but I’m more overwhelmed. His first year has gone so quickly, I feel like I’ve missed so much.
So this is a very long way of saying… I’ve loved reading your blog, I will miss it. I hope you find some peace during this break and a new direction to take the blog and your work.
All the best.
Meghan
Rosemary Bedosky says
I will miss you. Pls rest up, but come back. Love your blog. I wrote a few weeks ago that you should republish work on Thursdays and entitled it Throw Back Thrusdays.
And I LOVED the show house…I might not had made the same choices, but I loved your thought process and explanations. Thought it was so interesting…always wanted to know how it felt to make “bigger” decisions than you were used to. Was it never wracking spending someone else’s $$ or did it come freely?
I also love the Richmond area and love to see the design choices and what’s popular there.
Please come back well rested.
Carey Power says
Well, I don’t think I have ever posted in your blog…maybe once. I just want you all to know, that you have a huge talent….and I think we are all way too hard on ourselves. You are the BEST at what you do…I get all your jokes….like “thats my Jamb” god I laughed. I log on nightly to check out new posts, or stumble over old posts that I missed. I write lists, and talk about you to my husband! You inspire me to no end! Come back some day, on your time….Bigger and Better…..you are too good to not. Best of luck, and thanks for sharing your talent.
Molly says
You have been a huge inspiration to me, and I’ve loved every single one of your posts! Thanks! I hope this blogging break leads you to happiness, whatever you end up deciding to do.
Zoe says
best wishes guys!
have a lovely break.
love and peace
xxx
Tara says
I didn’t even know what a blog was until I stumbled upon yours years ago, and I’ve enjoyed and been inspired in some way shape and form by every post. May this break give you a chance to take the time to decide what your family needs most, which is really all that matters, after all. I wish you the best of luck!
Emily says
Add me to the tally of people who shed a tear over this post! Hope you find exactly what you are looking for on your break, I’ll be eagerly awaiting your return!
Maria Gonzalez says
You have inspired and brought joy to so many (including me) over the years! Nothing will erase that. Enjoy your time off. Everyone deserves and needs rest. I have a teeny tiny blog compared to yours and I know how time consuming it is. I can’t imagine juggling a pregnancy, a small child, the opportunities that came your way and still keeping up with blog responsibilities. They are all incredible blessings and are all so rewarding but when they all happen at once, it’s hard to keep our joy and peace. I think we all need a sabbath every now and then. When/If you come back, your community will be here. You guys rock!
Michele C says
You two are way too kind for any reader who makes you feel like you have somehow let them down. No one pays a subscription to read your blog. You get to do what you want to do and don’t owe anyone anything. If I am not interested in your post at any specific time, I just move on – though that rarely happens.
My vote if you choose to return is to turn the comments off! You do such a great job showing us your how-to process, it will be a shame if you don’t come back when you like and say what you want to say. I do hope you show off the kitchen and your DIYs when you finally get to that room.
On the flip side, this was a charmed time for a lot of us. Blogging and etsy made my success, and I am very thankful. However, if this time is complete and a new turn takes you back to day jobs and/or an unpublished life and concentrating on the real people & family who matter, then remember all this fondly and move on to better things.
You have done a great job, even when you were just “trying” to come up with content. Far better content than the ridiculous comments that shamefully question you and bring you down.
You’ve done a great job and taught all of us so much about process and trial and error. What a success you are! Enjoy it! It has been a fun bunch of years watching you grow.
Michele
Kate S says
I’ve read every post over the past 5 years, but rarely comment. Some of my best home projects have been inspired by you. I often find myself turning to your posts for any how-to advice before I look anywhere else. I find myself asking, wonder which brand YHL used or how did they get around this challenge? I also genuinely appreciate how you never took sponsored posts. Too many good blogs have been ruined by over sponsorship.
You deserve this break. But before you go, just know the joy and inspiration you’ve brought to so many. Hopefully this break will re-energized you and make you excited to come back and we’ll all be here when you do!
Until then, you’ll be deeply missed but most importantly, thank you!
Jenny B says
The internet is amazing for the sense of entitlement that it gives some people! We have been getting free diy and decor advice for years, as well as laugh out loud writing and a glimpse into the life of an adorable family, all for the cost of the click of a button and a few seconds of our time. The people put out by whatever changes you have made to your blog astound me. I am so sad that you might stop blogging because you are my favorite bloggers, but I appreciate that you have to do what is best for your sanity and your beautiful family. Good luck, and thanks for the years of your time and creativity that you have put into your blog.
Julie Kohler says
I’m with the many who didn’t sense anything off, but I’m known for obliviousness. I will miss your posts along with the other 2500 commenters (and the many others who don’t post). But I’m pretty sure the first 3 months off counts as family leave, anyway, and you’re entitled to that by law, after all! Thank you!!
Stephanie says
Congratulations on a tough decision. I hope the time away is good for you personally and professionally. And I hope you don’t waste one single minute of it reading GOMI.
I hope you will come back to this blog, but if it never feels right, I thank you for all the posts, laughs and inspiration you’ve provided for the past seven years.
Best of luck to you wherever your path leads.
Beth says
You guys are so loved. May you find the spark to relight the fire. Your readers will be here, waiting for you to return when and if the time is right. Ultimately, the blog is yours. If you’re not happy with where it is heading, take the time you need to transform it in the way you want. Don’t give up. Fight for what you believe in and don’t let others direct your path.
Christine says
I love you guys too! You have no idea how many home projects you have helped my husband and me with (from both your blog and book) and in my real life with your personal posts (I.e., the breastfeeding one). I pre-ordered your book when it first came out because I felt like I owed you the money for all of the free help you have given me over the years! (And I will with the next book too!)
Please take the time you need, and follow your hearts. I will be here if you decide to come back – in whatever capacity that makes sense to you.
Julie says
Yo! I’m one of your non commenters, but in case you’re reading through these 2000+ comments late at night, let me say that I’ve read your blog off and on for these seven years, but something CLICKED (eeks, autocorrect wanted this to say “cocked” which would totally change the mood of this affirmation) for me this past year and I now read every post as soon as I see it’s posted!!!
So, for what it’s worth, I think you’re doing a fabulous job! It boggles my mind that I willingly read a tutorial on connecting laundry hoses…and laugh while I do it.
Enjoy YOUR PAUSE THAT REFRESHES! It is a wise person who is able to take the time to reflect.
Jessica says
Will miss the blog so much. I look forward to it as a nice break everyday after a crazy day. Understand your decision, but will be missed immensely!
Julie says
I have truly enjoyed reading your blog for several years. I will be here and very happy when you return. Enjoy your time away from the blog and I hope you guys find a balance that works with your family now. I have two little guys as well, and we have to remember that they come first, not our jobs.
Sheri says
Godspeed, Petersiks.
Lisa says
I’ve been following you guys for about two years now. I think you have done a great job with this blog! It’s been a gift to me and seemed a labor of love on your part. Wishing you all the best as you work on finding the passion and balance you are looking for. I wanted you to know how much you are appreciated and that you will be missed.
Sylvie says
We all take breaks from different things over the course of our lives and it is a natural and healthy thing to do. Most of us don’t have public lives and we don’t need to explain our reasons for doing so. Neither should you. If it feels right to you, then do it. I am happy that you have the courage to stop and reflect on your professional life. It’s not the end, it’s a turning point, and you may find something better and greater ahead. I wish you well.
Laura says
It’s so great that you are taking a break… Just please, please come back! I’ve never missed a post in 5 years, and your blog has inspired me in so many ways. Thank you!
Michelle (aka mybelle101) says
Wow…that was a surprise! But I completely understand, and just want you guys to know that I love you, and your sweet family, and your blog. Take the time you need to evaluate, rest, and rediscover that spark that we all love. I’ll be checking and hoping to see you back! xoxo
Christine says
Not surprised, but very sad to see you end on what seems like a down note. I would have liked to see some of your reaction in your comments to the outpouring of affection coming your way today. I also wish John’s voice was part of your sign off. Having said that, if you come back, I certainly will, as well. After all, bits and bobs of your talent can be seen in many of our homes! Keep your chin up, use the constructive criticism to flesh out what makes you get up in the morning and whatever that is, I hope you’ll keep in touch.
Tasha says
Good on ya. I love anyone brave enough to step back from anything that’s not making them totally happy and re-evaluate and possibly adventure into something new and scary. YHL is the one thing on the internet that I look forward to, rather than being something to just pass the time or purely informational. Your skilled writing, conversational tone, fun pop culture references, practicality, and insistence on a job well done all make it my favorite blog. I don’t even particularly like DIY, but I read almost all of your posts. I will miss YHL, and do hope that you return, but maybe as something new and different (and perhaps less personal–that must be so taxing–for your sakes).
Take care, and best wishes to you!!!
maureen says
Love you more……
Emily P in DC says
You are smart to take some time to reflect and reassess. Don’t forget that in Europe they give people a year or more off from work when they have a baby. Not because they are just super nice people, but because babies are challenging and they make you rethink everything!!!!!! You should not have to think about anything beyond what’s right for your family right now. Take all the time you need.
Jen says
I’ve really enjoyed watching the transformations of your homes and family. I hope you find the right balance. Good luck :)
Jenna says
As a long time reader, I have to say I’m extremely sad to hear this news and I will miss you guys like CRAZY! I hope you return soon.
I have to say, though, that it’s not just you guys. There has been a shift in the blogosphere the last year or so. I’m not sure what it is… if people are just finding other sources of inspiration or if the whole community has become too commercial. Whatever it is, I wish it would go away so we could all get back to the good ol’ bloggy days.
Stephanie B. says
As a girl who just quit her job for many of the same reasons, I hope you find this time as life-renewing, re-energizing, and peace-giving as I hope to find as well. I know how I feel so I can only imagine how you feel too. All the best. All the love.
Jevne says
I have always been inspired by your bravery and grace in sharing your lives with us. Thank you!
kra says
Sherry and John: I have read every single one of your posts for the past three years and this is my first comment!!! Just know that I have loved being inspired by your blog and by watching your family grow. Best wishes to you all, and I really hope you come back to blog land.:-))))
Brandy J says
Although I’m sorry for me that you’re taking a break, I hope that you guys come back refreshed and continue the blog. I love reading it whether it was daily or now a couple times a week. When you first slowed down, I was bummed, but honestly it probably was the catalyst for me to slow down on blog reading in general and to get to more ‘doing’! I’ll miss your instagram posts too!! Hurry back!
Dena says
I am heartbroken if you feel that you are “stumbling” – in your words. I don’t think so when I read your blog. I applaud you in taking a break and spending time with your family. And I love your blog now and forever, so when you’re ready, I’ll all be waiting for you, and so will your entire fan base. And if you’re not, that’s ok, too – just know that we’ll all miss you.
Eva says
About four years ago my husband said I needed to read your blog. Retired from teaching I felt blog reading was time wasted. To please my husband I checked y’all out, and daily when I can , I stop in to read my favorite blog . Take care, and as I tell friends, I’ll pray for you.
Paula Meldrum says
Your family life deserves this!
I am sure this was one of the hardest decisions of your life
Obviously with your break you will figure out what you need to do as a family. But let me leave you with this one small tidbit
Currently you are liviing the dream of most, being able to work together and make money at it. Think back to what it felt like to work in the office everyday, how it affected your daily chores outside work and being tied to a box with set hours etc. I used to work in a box and was tied to a desk and felt suffocated even though I was good at the job, through that job I was able to get this dream job of working from home and I wouldn’t trade it.
I love all you guys do, it is your true talent for sure, my hubby and I love to update and renovate together as well, but you both have a witty and amazing way with words that most don’t have. My favorite part was your titles of the blogs amazing … Seriously :)
Rework what you do and find the passion again, I never felt your blog was lagging, of course I wanted more but who wouldn’t want more of something that truly brightens your day and makes you smile. I miss your house crashes, but other than that you are doing everything most of us can only dream of. Take the time you need but know you will have readers even if you take a step further back etc.
I love you, and love that you care enough for a no holds barred request for honesty, but let me be honest with you, there will always be nay Sayers and jealous people out there. There are also people that love you guys for just being real, that’s what we love, so just get your real back, and be you, with no apologies … Seriously, you will not lose readers, we seek it and respect it. I do hope you come back someday, and whatever you bring to the table as long as it is real will be amazing.
And by the way you do not need to apologize for not letting us know every detail of your life, (eg third house) you deserve some privacy, everyone should respect that, I was so happy for you and overjoyed at your third house selection, they don’t make too many neighborhoods or houses like that anymore especially here in Canada
Anyways I have rambled long enough, but i felt you should know a different perspective
Thank you for seven years I have enjoyed every moment of it, you guys have loved us and stuck with us longer than most marriages ;p
It is appreciated!
Paula Meldrum
Amanda says
Good luck with the space! Enjoy that lovely family of ours. I’ll miss you, and I hope to see you soon!
Sarah says
I really enjoy your blog. I appreciate the step back you took after Teddy was born. We had our second child this year and it is a joyful but busy time!
I’ve really enjoyed your posts since too. Super excited bout your beautiful laundry room you have. I’m also selfishly hoping you’ll be continuing at least part time or once a month. We are planning to bug our first home this coming year. Thanks for leaving us access to posts for inspiration! And all the best to you and your family no matter what u decide!
Kelly O. says
Some thoughts: 1) Of course you should do whatever is best for your family. You can definitely see the love your fans / friends / followers have for you — and we don’t want to lose you, but will understand if that is your ultimate decision. 2) Yes to the idea of a sabbatical! 3) The family work balance is always hard. Assuming you still need an income to pay the mortgage, then maybe the current gig isn’t as bad as a traditional job? (yes this is a selfish hope!!); 4) my partner left the practice of law for many reasons, primarily health. She is now back helping me with the fun stuff. Discovery depos! Easy and fun! Maybe you could cut out the things you don’t enjoy and focus on the rest? And 5)Is there anything WE can do? I have never commented before, but if it helps you for your followers to comment on every post then we will! Don’t know you in person, but love your family and wish you the best!!! Oh yeah — I can’t imagine answering every comment — maybe you could stop that part. It must be insanely time consuming!
Kari says
I haven’t read all the comments on this or the other post, because in the hectic chaos of my life these days, I’m thinking I’m doing pretty good just reading the post. Having perused a couple, though, to get the flavor of what the reactions have been, I am chiming in.
I have been reading you ever since you were linked to on Lifehacker, before Clara. It amazes me, sometimes, how long that has been. I’ve had several dreams that I’ve come to visit you and we hang at parties at your house.
My favorite thing about you is how you keep it real. I used you once in a workshop presentation about shame. Having a perfect house is a big shame trigger for me (in other words, when my house isn’t perfect, I often feel I am myself unworthy of love), and when I read about your successes and failures, and your behind-the-scenes magazine shoot where you show just exactly how clothes are pinned behind you or tables are momentarily lifted up, I realize that things aren’t always how they seem in magazines and it helps me keep my own house in perspective.
At this stage of our lives, we are not DIY’ing much. We’ve done far too much in our time, and though we’ve got many-o-project that needs doing, it’s not in the budget or time schedule.
Of the handful of blogs I used to read daily, this is the only one that has persisted. I keep reading because of your writing style and because of the perspective mentioned earlier. Obviously, I feel a little like your friend because you show up in my dreams and we hang at your house. But not a creeper friend, or anything. Don’t worry.
Have things changed? Yes. Understandable? Yes. Would I recommend anything different? No. Because the biggest thing about this blog that I like is that you are who you are. Take that away, and you lose anything worth keeping.
I will miss you tremendously. It may be that not seeing you posting for a month I may get out of the habit of checking. But “whatever way our story ends, I know you have re-written mine” by being great bloggers.
May you find the peace you deserve and the happiness you desire.
With as much love as I can send to people whom I have actually never met,
Kari
Becky says
I really hope you come back! Everyone needs a break so enjoy it. I was just saying today that you’re the only blog I read religiously. Xoxo hug those babies!
Jennifer says
I’m so sad. But those are my own selfish reasons. Your readers will always be your readers, whether it’s daily, monthly, or annual. Thank you for all your time.
Sarah S says
I’ve been reading you guys since the beginning and am always so inspired. Take whatever time you need, feed your souls, recharge, and we will be here for you when you (hopefully) come back.
Carla B. says
Would it be too much to ask for a couple of Clara and Teddy pics every once in a while? Or anything new you’ve done to the house? You know, kinda on the sly; just slide them in the blog (without words)? :-)
Seriously though, I totally get and respect your decision here! And I’ll be looking forward to your return, whenever that may be. Take care of you and your family!
Tammy says
Beautifully written. So honest. Makes me an even bigger fan.
Martha says
I am a long time reader but first(?) time commenter – just wanted to say: Good on you! I will be hoping you return, of course, but think you are absolutely doing the right thing.