This post was 3,000 words long. They all felt overly complicated and heavy and weird. I clicked delete. Then I just typed what we’re really feeling, complete with things we’ve never said out loud and even a few things we’ve never fully admitted to ourselves before.
The truth is that we love you guys. Like for real. Even for the tough love. We know you say it because you care (or hopefully you did at some point), and we want you to know we care right back. We want to do a good job. We want to do this with joy and excitement. We want to inspire you. We know this is an incredible way to have made a living and we are full of gratitude for the experience to have shared the last seven years of our lives with you guys online.
We would NEVER be here without you, and not a day goes by that we don’t know that. It’s why we asked for your feedback last week and read every last comment. We appreciate the honesty and the passion you guys have on the topic of making this blog great. And we agree with a lot of what was being said. We have been feeling off for a while – like we have lost our rhythm and we’re somehow missing the mark for ourselves and for you guys. We too miss the good old days when we did this for the love and were full of such obvious joy and spontaneity. This felt like a place we all hung out and it just doesn’t have that vibe anymore.
Over the years many amazing opportunities popped up for us. Things we never dreamed of doing in a million years, and things we’re incredibly grateful to have had the chance to experience. A book deal, curating paint picks with Benjamin Moore, a line sold at Target, a showhouse, etc. But in hindsight those things also made this feel a lot more like a business than a personal blog to many of you, and to us as well. We have actually ramped those down behind the scenes in an attempt to get back to our roots (we no longer do the BM color collection, the second book is mostly written, our products at Target have completed their run, and we finished the showhouse) but we never really made a big announcement about that – so it’s completely understandable that some of you might think we’ve moved on to those greener pastures and left the blog in the dust, so to speak. The reality is that our site propels the success of any outside project like a product or book, so we could never turn our backs on the blog and expect those items to continue to sell as well.
Not only have we felt this shift from “John and Sherry” to “Young House Love: The Brand”, but the blogosphere as a whole has become increasingly sponsored/corporate lately. We can see from the outside prospective as a reader, or even a fellow blogger, that it’s hard to read a blog post without suspecting some ulterior motive or money-making system behind it. Last week a few of you mentioned that we might need to keep giveaways around because they pay us well, which surprised us since they’re never something we accept payment for (we like to pass free things along to you as a thank you for reading).
Along with the whole business/brand thing that’s going on, and the side gigs that felt like they muddied the water for some of you, there are certainly other things we wish we had handled differently in hindsight. Just to name a few, there’s: being too defensive, over-explaining, letting things get in our heads and change our lighthearted approach, and the internal struggle between being transparent and oversharing personal details like a vacant new house without an alarm system (looking back we wish we’d handled our third house announcement differently). We know many of you felt insulted that we didn’t share more freely about that house, and we truly apologize.
Anyway, back to that whole “we’re sexy stumbling and you know it” thing. It’s endlessly frustrating to do a job that you love poorly, especially when it’s a blog baby that you’ve birthed yourself and nurtured for seven years. And especially when it’s such an amazing job that we once felt so inspired and joyful to wake up and do each day. What’s wrong with us? We know this is a dream job. We acknowledge it’s a once in a lifetime opportunity. We know most people who have built something like this would be more inspired than ever. It’s not that we lost the gratitude, I think it’s that we feel like we’ve fallen out of our groove. We feel like we’re letting you guys down repeatedly. It got to the point that every time we pressed “publish” we braced ourselves.
So in an attempt to stop stumbling around and feeling like we just can’t get it back, we’re taking a break. We don’t know exactly how long we’ll be stepping away, but our guess would be at least a month. We will certainly be exploring other options for supporting our family (something we mentioned we were considering back in April). We had that fiery blog-spark back when we had day jobs and did this as a hobby, so we think it could be a good change. We’ll also be taking a break on Twitter, Instagram, and Facebook, but the blog will stay public so you guys can access the archives whenever you’d like.
Our internal struggle and the state of this blog is entirely of our making, and we completely own that. Please don’t get mad at anyone for being honest with their feedback last week or accuse them of sending us packing. We have been struggling with that “something is off” feeling for a while now, and after way too much denial and “we’ll turn it around” pep talks, we finally asked for your feedback because we truly wanted to hear what you were thinking. It was cathartic and helpful for us. It has allowed us to very clearly see that if we have any respect for this blog and our love of it, and for you guys and what you’d like to see, we need to take a break if we ever want any hope of getting back to that fun/real/spontaneous place it used to be when this was something we did for the love instead of the high stakes game of supporting a family.
In summary: we love you, we thank you, and we hope you understand.
Sophie says
I’ve been counting down the days for y’all to come back. I miss you like crazy. From Clara’s bedroom to Teddy’s photo project you always have me engaged. I get sad when I check blogs now to know I won’t be reading a new post today. I have been going back through the archives to get a little dose of YHL. Even if it is a couple years before you come back, I’ll always be reading. I was near tears in the blogiversary Those posts have always been my favorites. Thanks for the blood, sweat, and tears
Julie J says
I’m off the blog for a couple of weeks and I come back to this post. I feel sad. For me because I’ll miss your posts but more so I feel sad for you two. I am sickened by the rude and entitled posts from readers and I would have feelings too. However, I probably wouldn’t handle them as maturely, honestly and professionally as you did. Good for you. I wish you peace, clarity, fun and rejuvenation on your break. I hope you come back because I and lots of others find huge value in your work but I hope you come back on terms that make you feel whole and proud. If you don’t come back best of luck in your future endeavors!
kaylan says
when i first read this post i was sad for you. i know what it’s like to be burnt out from a job that you once loved and it must be doubly hard when you have a public following constantly critiquing your work.
but as i’ve checked back once a week or so to see if you’ve returned, i’ve been increasingly annoyed that your comment count keeps rising. if you’re taking a break, TAKE A BREAK. you’re still here, you’re still stressed as i’m sure you’re getting a fair amount of snarky comments that aren’t being published. do yourself a favour and completely walk away for a few weeks. turn the comments off and don’t look back. don’t explain, don’t apologize, just do it.
jrh says
Talk about constantly critiquing, ha! Here you are critiquing how the YHLers spend their time off. Maybe you should walk away and stop checking comments :)
Kaija says
It may not be S&J who are approving the comments. If I wanted to take a break, and still have people comment, I would hire someone else to do it.
Sherri says
I just wanted to comment that John and Sherry wouldn’t have someone else monitor their comments, just like they have never wanted to have help with the blog to lighten the load. That’s not their style. They are authentic, and that’s what is special about them. I check back daily because I hope the comment count rises to 10,000, so that they know how much many of us miss them. After a hard day at work, my little treat when all else is done for the evening- is to check out YHL. It’s just been part of my daily routine for years now, and I miss my YHL fix.” Get a life,” some may say. I actually do have a life, a blessed one at that- but I still miss and heart the Petersiks’ and their mighty blog!!
Kaija says
There’s nothing unauthentic about delaying reading the comments and having someone else review and approve comments with the guidelines you’ve given them in the meantime. When you feel up to it/have time, you can go back to read the comments.
Margaret P says
This is not the end its the middle. And sometimes the middle is crazy looking, doesn’t feel right, and can make us nervous but will still come together in the end. My favorite lesson. Thank you.
Lynn @ Safebeauty says
Sigh…I don’t want to make you feel bad, but you guys made me cry. Like, hard. It was the end of a tough couple of days and your announcement hit hard. But no worries. That’s my circus and my monkeys so, my prob, not yours. :)
I miss ya guys like whoa. It’s to the point that I am starting to think of the gif I am going to post the day you come back (perhaps?) with your follow-up “Here’s What Imma Do With the Rest of Our Lives” post.
And I know you’re there. I see the Comments section has gotten a little looky loo presto-chango, right? :o) (Why yes Lynn, yes it has.) See? Now I’m talking to myself.
Tomorrow, let’s go down Memory Lane together shall we?
Sri says
isn’t today the birthday (or Anniversary) of YHL? come back soon :) Happy Anniversary
Luisa says
Please don’t goooooo, don’t goooooo, don’t gooooo awayyyyyyy…..
James Mason says
Enjoy your break guys, and work and blog just for the fun of it and when you feel like it.
All the best.
livingoutproud says
Enjoy your break…but I hope you’ll be back! Your blog has been so inspirational to my own house projects! You will be missed!
Katie says
So don’t get me wrong, I will miss the post each day (can you say…first thing I look at each day) but what I hate the most about this time off from blogging is the lack of weekly photos of Teddy! I really hope that y’all backlog those once you are up and running again. Heart Y’all!
Angela in RVA says
I miss you guys so much…I hope that, whatever your online future looks like, it will include some sort of continuation of your home projects and decorating… Since my kids are 12 years and above, I was never consumed by your kid stuff. I enjoyed it, but could live without it, if you decide to pull back on featuring them as much. But, your fun, practical, cool, budget-minded, do-it-yourself ideas and advice kept me coming back, week after week. I knew I was on to something when you inspired me to try my hand at covering my office lamp shade with an old Paris map. Of course, I’ll respect whatever decision you make, but wanted to share some positive feedback about how much WE LOVE YOU GUYS!!!! :)
October says
We love you and miss you! Please come back – when you’re ready, of course!
I do still come back everyday, just hoping and wishing.
Kelly says
Glad to see I’m not the only person who comes back regularly to see if by chance you’ve popped in with an update. I wholeheartedly support you doing whatever is right for your family, but boy I sure hope that includes continuing YHL. I’ve been here since before Clara was born, and even though I have never commented except on a Giveaway, I believe I have read AND enjoyed every single post. I sure do miss you all and find myself wondering what is new in the Petersik world. Is Teddy sitting up? Does Clara love school? Has anything happened in the dining room yet? How does the fall mantle look? When are we getting to that kitchen floor? Book II updates! I bet the trees are starting to turn colors and your yard looks beautiful. From the heart, I really do miss you all!
Jozé Roth says
Very interesting article today in the New York Times about YHL. I miss them, they have been an inspiration to many of my own DIY projects
Mary says
Come back please!!!!!!!!!!!!
Jill says
I’m still checking your blog daily….just in case you decided to come back early :)
riverdaughter says
Holy Hemiola! I couldn’t figure out where you were getting the negative feedback that you refer to here on this post so I went back to the curtains giveaway and read that horrible stuff. I run a political blog and thought MY commenters got out of line. Who the hell are those people? I mean, really, it was uncalled for. You guys have developed a great style. You shouldn’t be ashamed of it because your sofa doesn’t cost $12,000. You don’t have to live up to someone else’s expectations. That’s what Remodelista is for. You guys were in advertising and should know by now about niches and branding. That doesn’t mean you can’t evolve and grow but screw those people who are impatient for high end stuff.
Actually, I kind of admire your thriftiness and the results are usually pretty awesome.
Like I said before, for people who have never run a blog, they have no idea how much time it takes to create content. There have been times in the past when I wonder when you guys sleep. It seems like you’re always either doing something or posting something. It’s a lot of work. Your negative commenters have no idea. So, if you are really concerned about them (I wouldn’t be) you could do “a day in the life of YoungHouseLove” video to set them straight.
Otherwise, F&*( them. You were doing great until you let their negativism, envy and criticism into your head.
Michelle M says
I not only ENJOY the thriftiness- I read this blog because of it. Most of the projects done here are STILL financially over my head- but I can attempt some of it, and it’s probably the skills I will someday need to adopt to have a beautiful home like theirs.
I LOVE that. I can look at Houzz.com for the high end stuff – or HGTV.
Elizabeth says
Absolutely! Hear hear.
I love that you work to a budget. I also love that you break down the budget for readers. It gives us a realistic idea of how much it would cost to attempt some of your projects. And the fact that you often work in a thrifty item, is great. It makes your blog, and your home real.
Like Michelle M said, some of your projects and purchases are still over my head (and impossible to purchase as I’m in Australia) but I can use your projects and purchases as inspiration while I find what works for me.
Love you guys, hope you’re having a fabulous break.
Kelly says
Happy 7th blogiversary! I hope you are enjoying your family and taking a much needed break. I also hope you continue blogging as it’s the highlight of my work week … but that’s just the selfish part of me speaking. ;)
Kelli Knight says
Gosh, I miss you guys. A lot. I feel like you were my next door neighbors and then you moved away.
Marianne says
Hey guys. I feel like you broke up with me. I get it. . . It’s a not-you, it’s-me, thing. And though I respect your decisions, I miss your blog. Just wanted to let you know, if you’re still reading the comments.
Quilter says
I hope you are taking a true break and not moderating comments!
Jennifer W says
YHL Withdrawal…is that a thing?! I think it is now!!
Miss you guys like WOAH!!! I miss having my morning coffee and the excitement of reading your blog every morning! I feel lost without you guys! Seriously the best blog out there! Totally get why you took the break, but just wanna say I love you guys!!!
singlemomthriving says
Jennifer, I’m having YHL Withdrawal too. Everyday, I would check to see if it was 9am yet so I could check the blog. I loved that they were consistent with their timing, that they were thrifty and could make a beautiful mountain out of a molehill of inexpensive stuff, and they taught me how to think through my projects. I hope they come back soon. It’s like having family out of town for too long.
~Dona
AnnMarie says
I had a dream last night that there was a YHL post this morning and it was a very, very good dream. The whole time, though, in the back of my head I was thinking, “But wait, it hasn’t been a month yet, how is there a post?” ^_^
Carin says
If you’re still reading these comments: I hope that your time off is relaxing and you find inspiration about where to go next. I love YHL, and have been checking in with you guys regularly for years. There are periods when I check everyday, and then other times, not so much, which is more about me than you. I love that your posts are varied; I wouldn’t be back as often if it were only family updates or detailed how-to’s or styling a shelf or wall or off-site projects or giveaways. The mix is part of the wonderfulness that is YHL! I certainly hope you guys are back soon with your quirky humor, distinctive style, and beautiful family life. And if not, I wish you the absolute best!
Michelle says
Has it been a month yet?? Miss reading you guys soo much!
Laura says
OMG, I can’t believe you are in the New York Times for taking a break!! I am trying to imagine if this makes you feel honored or way more pressure. I’m sure it’s a surreal experience. I’m hoping it makes you want to stick with blogging, since it’s obvious that people pay attention and care about you. Your blogging break is in the national newspaper of record. Crazy times!
singlemomthriving says
Is there a link to the New York Times article? I need a YHL fix. :)
~Dona
M says
Dona,
Here is a link to the NYT article: http://www.nytimes.com/2014/09/25/garden/when-blogging-becomes-a-slog.html?_r=0
Lee says
article link, for anyone interested – http://www.nytimes.com/2014/09/25/garden/when-blogging-becomes-a-slog.html?ref=garden&_r=0
Kris says
Best wishes to you as you discover what fuels your next fire. And don’t feel bad about it, you should be proud of yourselves for doing what you live and for recognizing when it doesn’t feel right anymore :)
Kristy says
Happy Blog Birthday! I miss you guys something terrible See, I moved away from my family and friends for my husbands career. I don’t know a soul in this city and you guys along with a few other blogs I love to read are the only “friends” I got to bring with me. I totally get why you need a break but know that you are terribly missed. As silly as it sounds, there is definitely a void where my YHL time used to be spent. I hope that you pop on for a Re-birth post today. It would be a great time to come back and celebrate why you started blogging in the first place. If not, I will still be checking every day.
Britiney @ Consider the Lilies says
Just thinking about you today. And sending love. <3
J Summerford says
I have nothing to say that hasn’t been said better in thousands of previous comments, but then I imagined the two of you thinking, “If only there had been ONE more comment we would have crossed the threshold into feeling appreciated (and sparky!) again.” So here it is: You two are terrific in all you do, and if the blog doesn’t return you will be missed!
Best wishes in whatever the future holds for you.
Summer
AMM says
I just had my second around the time Teddy was born and feel my first is growing up way to fast as well (3.5 years old). Babies put a shining light on your priorities. :) I have always admired your transparency and openness, but you have a right to privacy and to live a less hectic life. Take as much time as you need. Come back if you want; don’t if you don’t. We appreciate what you have done, We get it: you do what you do not for the external validation or money, but for how you feel inside. If you aren’t feeling it, and you are feeling the need to be with your family, which is why I suspect you took this job in the first place. Good luck! Have fun! Hope to see you soon (or not!).
Wendy Woodall says
I know I’m late in commenting, but wanted you to know you will be missed, but very understandable that you are doing this. I think that the blog business model is a very difficult thing to sustain, as you are responsible for the content and coming up with that constantly can be a drain on anyone. Maybe take this chance to evaluate how to change the whole blogging industry as a whole? I don’t know. With my little old blog, I used to post several times a week, but now, I’m lucky if I get something up there once a month. It’s just not as fun and exciting to me anymore and I think part of it is because I’m constantly comparing myself to others and my self-confidence has truly been effected by reading others blogs and seeing how fabulous and productive others can be and I’m crap because I can barely draft myself out of bed at 7:30 in the morning. Enough about me, just follow your heart and I don’t worry a bit about you guys because you are clearly so very talented and more great things are still to come!
Rick says
LOL Well, I have to laugh. Over 4000 comments. I’ve had a blog for well over 7 years about my pooches and would never dream of or want so much adoration. I have kept up with your blog for some time but I don’t check in everyday with bated breath. The blog world has changed dramatically and that’s okay. It doesn’t take long to learn which ones are there for money. What’s more annoying is the, pardon me, “kiss ass”, culture which seems to be similar to a chain letter–constantly mentioning or plugging another blog or blogger. That’s stressful to keep up with for a long period of time. Obviously your blog and most all blogs will evolve, change with the times, or bite the dust. I’ll be glad the next time I stop by if there’s a nice picture or interesting project. Until then, good luck.
Jenna says
Happy (belated) blogiversary! I think it was yesterday but I was really busy so I couldn’t comment until today.
I hope you are all doing well!
apple1984 says
I went ahead and read the comments where you asked your readers for feedback – whaaaaaaaaaaaaa? People can be so inconsiderate. It’s so easy to be harsh and mean towards somebody when you are not saying it to their face and merely typing out your thoughts on a piece of electronic. If your blog doesn’t suit these negative souls anymore, they can carry on to other websites – good ol’ interweb is bursting at the seams with decorating sites who are trying to be just like you, but cannot quite compare. What’s very sad about this now is that all of us who thoroughly enjoyed reading your blog every day are now suffering the consequences. And HONESTLY, I even read comments about how much you make to run the blog.. (!!!!!) Who cares what your remuneration is by working on your baby (the blog), the very site you created years ago. If you think about it, many entrepreneurs who first started their businesses were struggling at the beginning. But once your customers/clients/readers notice how your product stands out from the rest, you usually start making more money and that ball is rolling, baby! It’s basically Maslow’s hierarchy – the business version.
Anyway, thank you so much for all the inspiration you provided throughout the years for all of us who can’t really pull a room together without advice. And thank you for all the CHEAP suggestions (spray painting, flea market finds….). Some us us cannot afford high-end pieces, or really, would just rather spend our hard earned moolah on something else. Also, thank you for leaving all your entries from the passed years up – I’ll be sure to refer to them for ideas,
Now, I’m not sure what colour I should paint my kitchen and which shade the cupboards should be updated to. :( Whomp.
Come back!
Maddie says
Missing you! Hope your break is going well…but can’t help checking in to see if *maybe* you came back. I’ve loved blogversary posts and missing those especially! I of course hope you decide to come back, but I hope even more that you find a solution that brings you more peace, pride and happiness. *internet hugs*
Emily says
Please, please, please, please come back. I have nothing else to read and I miss you so much.
Erin{Home Everyday} says
I miss you, and am thinking of you.
Gloria says
I’m glad you are taking the time to figure out what you want to do! BIG humongous thanks for keeping the blog up because I’ve already checked for ways to do things several times in the last few days =)
Rebecca says
Missing y’all! Rocking my babies for nap is not the same without you. Please come back soon!
Rebecca says
Let the haters hate. They don’t have anything better to do than whine.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfWlot6h_JM My girl Taylor Swift has a little something something to say about it!
brett says
I don’t know how you’re ever going to read 4000+ comments, but in case you get this far down the list, let me just say that I am learning how much work a blog is and also that after a few years anything can get old (for bloggers and readers) so I can completely understand you taking time to think about the future. I’m sure you guys have a ton of options and it has been really fun watching you both work from home and focus on innovating and creating a wonderful space for your “real” life. It was so much more real and engaging than a design show where the designers/builders didn’t actually live in the space! That said, I want to validate the idea of moving on. Even great TV shows reach the end of their arc (I just hope Game of Thrones never does), and as they say, the secret to a long life is knowing when it is time to go. So go do something new and fun but it would be great to keep the blog up as an archive and even better if you could keep us up to date on cool projects (we know you will never be able to stop doing them!) on Facebook.
Jen says
What a bummer to come back to the site today and realize, it has only been 16 days :( Miss you!
Christy says
I read this article when you first wrote it but didn’t have a chance to comment. Since then, I keep remembering at the worst times. We’ll blame that on a 2 year old and being pregnant with a second :) I’ve been reading your blog since before you had Clara and have thoroughly enjoyed it. I didn’t feel that something had been missing lately. I actually appreciated when you slowed down your blog posts per week. I got behind before. I completely understand taking a break to reevaluate things, but know that we’ll all be here when you come back :)
Becky says
I’ve been reading this blog for a few years and I’m about to move into my fiance’s house…I’ll finally be a homeowner! Don’t leave me now!
But in all honesty, you’ve created a wonderful. Be satisfied with your work, even if it is time for it to be finished. I’d love to see you come back in any form. I’m still obsessively checking your site…it’s hard to break a habit! :) Much love and good wishes to you!
Shannon says
Just checking to see if you were back…I selfishly miss you!
*Eugenia* says
Ohhh! Me encanta vuestro blog. Un beso enorme desde España.
saple says
its been two weeks without an update..reality is creepingin
Katie says
I just read the article about blogger burnout in NYTimes. I never really comment, but have read your blog since 2009. I have always enjoyed reading it and learning how to improve my own home. Thanks for all of your work over the years. It has been appreciated and enjoyed by many. Whether you start blogging again or not, know that your work here is loved!
Meredith Jones says
Y’all…I keep checking back at least every three days or so waiting for the day when you’re like weeeeeee’re baaaaaaack! I swear to my heart will literally skip a beat and I’ll get tears in my eyes at my desk at work that day. I feel like Clara and Teddy are growing up without me lol. Just wanted to say I’m thinkin of ya, and happy Blogiversary YHL! smoooooooch!