Over the years of jabbering on about house stuff I occasionally get questions about my family. How many siblings I have, how I grew up, etc. I always say it was a somewhat un-traditional childhood… in the best possible way. I was raised by my mom and dad, who split up when I was very young (a few years after my younger brother Daniel was born) so we just had two houses and bounced happily between them.
I remember when a kid at school once teased me for having divorced parents and I put the “I have two houses and you only have one and I get double the holiday presents” spin on it. Looking back, it was a moment of pure genius. Haha. No more teasing.
I also grew up with my half brother Adam, who was born after my dad married my step mom Nina a while later (he was 11 years younger than me). You might remember him from his cameo in the most embarrassing moment ever caught on film when I was 17.
But I always say I’m the oldest of five – and the only girl. So where do the other two fit in? Well, my Aunt Kay Kay (as we lovingly call my mom’s sister) and her two sons named David and Darius actually moved in with us when my brother and I were very young (my brother was 3 and I was 6). My mom is one of seven children, and while many of my aunts and uncles lived closer, Aunt Kay Kay and her kids used to live in Maryland, so we didn’t get to see our cousins very often, who were 2 and 4 at the time when they moved in… which was just one of about a million reasons we were SO excited for them to move in with us.
My aunt had been diagnosed with a craptastic disease called Multiple Sclerosis, so raising all four of us under one roof with my mom was a way that my mom could lend a hand to my aunt and also a way that my aunt could help us. My mom’s an attorney, and back in those days she was working her buns off to make partner at her firm, so she often got home late. So it was great to come home to my aunt after school, and on most nights she cooked us dinner and helped us with our homework. It was kind of a crazy house with four kids so close in age (four kids born within five years), but growing up with them honestly made me who I am today. Here’s my Aunt Kay Kay with me and my cousin David in the pool when we were little. Isn’t she beautiful?
My aunt was always laughing. She was “the nice one” while I, being the oldest of all the boys, proudly wore my title as “the bossy one.” My brother was “the smart one,” my cousin Darius was “the funny one,” my cousin David was “the crazy one,” and my mom was “the strict one.” So you can guess that when it came down to asking an adult if we could do something… well, we’d usually ask my aunt before my mom.
It was an odd little madhouse, but it was our madhouse and we loved it. So when people ask me how many siblings I have, I usually just say that I’m the oldest of five, and the only girl. But for those who have time for more details, I explain that my total includes one brother, one half brother, and two cousins who grew up under one roof with us like they were our brothers. We had all sorts of adventures over the years – from building forts in the woods to epic sock fights (don’t ask) and karate tournaments in New York City (that’s Darius on the left, me next to him, Daniel second from the right, and David on the right). We kicked some booty that day.
My aunt battled with her multiple sclerosis like a champ. Always smiling and making jokes. Always working hard to stay mobile. First she walked with a cane, then a walker, then a wheelchair, and for the last ten years or so she has been bedridden. Didn’t stop her from smiling (most notably when we stuck Burger or Clara in her bed – that always made her giggle). Strongest, bravest and sweetest woman I know.
Yesterday she passed away. It was a very very sad day. So although this might sound like a bummer of a post, I wrote it because I always wanted to remember how amazing and life-changing it was to grow up with such an awesome lady in my life. And I want Clara to be able to read about her Great Aunt Kay Kay someday. She could light up a room then, and thinking about her now brings a smile to my face. Just picturing us all gathered around the breakfast table fills me with nostalgia.
We’ll be back this afternoon with some regular DIY-related fare. In the meantime, feel free to tell/call/text/email/skype the ones you love. Family is such a blessing. And I’m so thankful for the one I got.
Jenn says
When I read the title, I had no idea that those “a few tears” would be coming from my eyes. What a beautiful tribute to a lovely woman who helped shape you into the person you are today. My condolences to you and your family.
corie says
Aw, Sherry! I’m so sorry for your loss. Your aunt sounds like an amazing woman who knew what was important in life!
*hugs*
verucaamish says
Wow. You grew up with a lot of love. Thanks for sharing with us. Your family kicks major ass. It’s pretty clear that Kay Kay’s blood runs in yours.
Liz says
So sorry for your loss, Sherry. Beautifully written.
Thinking of you
emily says
What a beautiful post and great tribute to your aunt. Touched and brought to tears by a story of a woman I don’t even know.
Kirsten says
I’m so sorry for your loss, Sherry. Thank you for sharing – it is a beautiful tribute to your Aunt. I’m sure your siblings, as well as Clara, can appreciate what you have written.
Meg says
Thinking of you and your fam today. It’s hard enough to lose a relative, but to lose a relative who was that close–I’m so sad for you all. Hoping you can all remember the happy in this difficult time. xo
Melinda says
MS really does suck! My father passed away from it 12 years ago, just months before I got married. It was heart-breaking, but I was glad that his suffering was over. This was a lovely post. Thanks!
YoungHouseLove says
Oh Melinda, I’m so sorry for your loss.
xo,
s
Candace says
Love to you and yours, family is the glue that binds, and while it’s usually crazy glue, that’s what makes it worth being stuck to them for your entire life.
sara v says
I’m sorry :(
My mom also has MS and has been bedridden for about 6 years now..She’s 48. Your aunt sounds like she was JUST like my mom. She was also the one we’d go to when we wanted something. Always smiling, laughing and having long conversations with strangers in the grocery store.
Thank you,I think I’ll go see her today.
Dee says
So sorry for your loss sherry.. What a beautiful tribute to your aunt.
Liz A. says
Reminds me of how many miles my aunt Jane ran behind the back of my bicycke holding on to the seat as I learned how to ride a bike. Blessings…
Kitty says
Sherry, I am so sorry for your loss. Aunts hold a very special place – somewhere between co-conspirator and confidante – and this is a beautiful tribute to yours.
I have lost a beloved Aunt too, to another cruel disease but her memory more than lives on (and her voice was echoing in my head the day I got married – she would have been in here element)
I’m glad you have so many memories of her, again, sorry for your loss.
Katie says
I’m sorry for your loss Sherry. My Great Aunt passed away after her long struggle with MS about 4 years ago. Luckily, I have some wonderful memories of her. Sounds like you have amazing memories of your aunt to share with Clara. Thinking of you and your family today.
Dawn says
So sorry for you loss. It is so hard to say goodbye to the ones we love…but we have hope to see them again in a new world with no pain and a perfect restored body. Praying for you and your family in this difficult time.
Sheila says
Thank you for sharing this post about you and your family. I feel the love in your family. =) Take Care, sheila
Jessi says
Fitting tribute for a woman so full of life — your lovely post and your life. You and John really seem to embrace each day, even the tough ones. No doubt, your aunt helped you learn that. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Julie says
I am so sorry for your loss. You are in my thoughts and prayers. I lost my grandmother to MS over 15 years ago. It was hard to watch her go from using a walker to eventually being wheelchair bound. She often watched me when I was little and well before the disease really took over. She was a great woman and I really feel she helped to shape who I am today. Hugs to you and your family!
Sarah says
What a beautiful family you have! It sounds like your aunt was a really amazing and strong woman.
Thank you for sharing this lovely post with us. I can always use a reminder to appreciate my family more.
kelly taylor says
I am so sorry for your loss. What a beautiful post.
Bethany A says
I am so sorry for your loss. Thankful that she is no longer suffering, but it is so hard for those left behind. Sounds like she was an amazing woman and what a wonderful legacy she left behind.
Allison says
This means so much to me. My mom has multiple sclerosis and we’ve had a ride of a time with it. My heart goes out to you and your family.
Suzette says
I’m so sorry Sherry. This post was just beautiful.
Stephanie says
That was a beautiful tribute to your aunt! I’ll be praying for your family during this sad time…
Wendy says
So sorry for your loss. Sending prayers your way.
Kelly says
This post has me bawling… I’m so sorry for your loss. My grandmother also had MS, and was also bedridden for the last ten years of her life. It was a terrible thing to watch. My heart goes out to you and your family. xx
Ami @ Parsnips and Pears says
I am so sorry for your loss Sherry. What a wonderful way to be able to honor your aunts life though and leave a message behind to share with Clara one day, and thank you for sharing it with all of us. It must have been wonderful to grow up surrounded by so many people who love you. A blessing indeed.
Amber says
So sorry for your loss. MS is truly a craptastic disease as you so eloquently put it. I too lost a close family member to MS just last week… the one thing I’ll remember about my cousin Clem, who sounds like he had the same attitude as your aunt, is his optimism. Even though he was bedridden, I never heard him complain about his situation and how he lived his life through everyone else, always asking for stories of our adventures. I’ve learned from Clem’s situation, that life is what you make of it. He, like your aunt, is gone too soon. But I know that’s he’s in a much better place where he can walk and run and drive tractors like the farmer he once was.
Jessica F. says
My sincerest condolences to you and your family and what a heartfelt and beautiful tribute to your amazing Aunt. You continue to scatter joy no matter what topic/project you are tackling, so thank you for being another positive force in this world. P.S. I just hugged my daughter and called my Mom.
Ally says
Sherry,
I share your tears, and I send your family my deepest condolences.
Your beloved Aunt Kay Kay is finally free…Godspeed…
xox
Jason says
I’m so sorry for your loss. We are all thinking of you!
Beth says
Your post is an amazing tribute to a special woman, and a great reminder to love people while we have them with us. My thoughts are with you and your family.
Sarah says
I’m so sorry for your loss. But as someone privileged enough to have many years with an extra mom (my grandmother) living in our home, I know what a special thing that is (even if it comes about bc of heartache, loss or struggle). I hope you get a chance to grieve with your family.
Reem says
She is not gone because she has helped make you who you are today, thus continuing her legacy. May she rest in peace.
Heather says
Sherry,
I am so sorry for you loss. My heart goes out to you and your family during this time. Your post was a great tribute to her and truly shows how much she meant to you.
Hugs!
Shweta says
Terribly sorry for your loss Sherry. And thank you for this beautiful post, made me sit back for a minute and be thankful for all the pleasures that only a family can bring. Take care all of you!
Stacy says
What a beautiful way to remember your aunt. It must be hard given that she actually lived with you growing up and was probably like your second mom. Prayers go out to your family.
Sherri says
Beautiful post about your equally beautiful family. I’m so sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my thoughts today. Don’t work too hard this week – take all the time you need to grieve your loss and be with your family.
Sydney says
Really sorry for your loss Sherry. My grandma had MS for a long time. She died pretty young and it was incredibly hard as a kid/young person to watch her go through the whole process. I feel for you.
Andrea says
Sorry for your loss, Sherry.
My MIL has MS that is starting to move quickly, and her brother, my husband’s god-father, died of MS in 2006. He was bedridden for quite a while, too.
It’s so sad to watch those who we love battle such a mean disease. Sending <3 and thoughts to you.
KLL says
My aunt is also struggling with MS. Craptastic is just one of the things that it is.
Watching the disease rob her of so much over the past 20+ years is something that affects us all. Her newest grandbaby lives right next door, but she can’t babysit him by herself. I can’t imagine how hard that is for her.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I understand how it feels to watch someone you adore endure phase after phase of this disease.
J says
What a wonderful way to remember your aunt. I am so sorry that she is no longer here, but am sure she always will be in spirit.
On a side note, your family sounds absolutely beautiful. I grew up in a similar way- when people ask I always tell them I have six siblings. But those who get to know me learn that my family is made of one biological sibling, two step siblings, and three half siblings. I couldn’t imagine a better way to grow up!
Christina P (NS) says
Our thoughts are with you and your family Sherry. It seems like you had a wonderful childhood and amazing memories to carry with you.
Valerie J. says
Condolences to you and your family. I’m sending you many hugs and prayers.
Katherine says
Sherry, that was so beautiful. Thank you for sharing your memories of Aunt Kay Kay with all of us. Smiling and crying over here. I’m so sorry for your loss.
Liliana says
Sherry, I’m so sorry for your loss. I love reading about your family; I love seeing how close you all are – it’s inspiring.
How cool your brother majored in chemistry. I wish him luck!
I hope its OK to share this: My husband and I enrolled our dog Sasha in a clinical study “Mason Bone Cancer Study.” Sasha was diagnosed with Bone Cancer and had her front right arm amputated. The vaccine being used was already used in humans, with great results. The study will not only help dogs but humans as well. It’s really amazing!
Again, I’m sorry for your loss, and thank you for sharing this post.
~ L.
YoungHouseLove says
So interesting! Thanks for sharing and sending Sasha lots of love!
xo,
s
Martha says
Sherry,
Thinking of you and your siblings. I grew up similar with my aunt and her kids…at one point 5 of us on a bed with a few on the floor. Good times! I’m superdeduper close to my cousins. My aunt passed away when she was 39 from a drunk driver hitting her which was totally unfair. That was over 20 years ago…we’ve all grown up with kids of our own. And her memory lives on.
xoxo, Martha
Amy @ PaintWineRepeat says
Thinking of you and your family. What a lovely and touching way to remember what a wonderful woman.
bekah says
So sorry for your loss, she seems like a wonderful woman who truly blessed so many, both directly and through her influence on all of you.
Naomi says
I’m so sorry for your loss, but it looks like you had amazing memories. I love your photos, and it was wonderful for you to share all those with us :)
? Naomi {Starry Eyes + Coffee Cups}