Over the years of jabbering on about house stuff I occasionally get questions about my family. How many siblings I have, how I grew up, etc. I always say it was a somewhat un-traditional childhood… in the best possible way. I was raised by my mom and dad, who split up when I was very young (a few years after my younger brother Daniel was born) so we just had two houses and bounced happily between them.
I remember when a kid at school once teased me for having divorced parents and I put the “I have two houses and you only have one and I get double the holiday presents” spin on it. Looking back, it was a moment of pure genius. Haha. No more teasing.
I also grew up with my half brother Adam, who was born after my dad married my step mom Nina a while later (he was 11 years younger than me). You might remember him from his cameo in the most embarrassing moment ever caught on film when I was 17.
But I always say I’m the oldest of five – and the only girl. So where do the other two fit in? Well, my Aunt Kay Kay (as we lovingly call my mom’s sister) and her two sons named David and Darius actually moved in with us when my brother and I were very young (my brother was 3 and I was 6). My mom is one of seven children, and while many of my aunts and uncles lived closer, Aunt Kay Kay and her kids used to live in Maryland, so we didn’t get to see our cousins very often, who were 2 and 4 at the time when they moved in… which was just one of about a million reasons we were SO excited for them to move in with us.
My aunt had been diagnosed with a craptastic disease called Multiple Sclerosis, so raising all four of us under one roof with my mom was a way that my mom could lend a hand to my aunt and also a way that my aunt could help us. My mom’s an attorney, and back in those days she was working her buns off to make partner at her firm, so she often got home late. So it was great to come home to my aunt after school, and on most nights she cooked us dinner and helped us with our homework. It was kind of a crazy house with four kids so close in age (four kids born within five years), but growing up with them honestly made me who I am today. Here’s my Aunt Kay Kay with me and my cousin David in the pool when we were little. Isn’t she beautiful?
My aunt was always laughing. She was “the nice one” while I, being the oldest of all the boys, proudly wore my title as “the bossy one.” My brother was “the smart one,” my cousin Darius was “the funny one,” my cousin David was “the crazy one,” and my mom was “the strict one.” So you can guess that when it came down to asking an adult if we could do something… well, we’d usually ask my aunt before my mom.
It was an odd little madhouse, but it was our madhouse and we loved it. So when people ask me how many siblings I have, I usually just say that I’m the oldest of five, and the only girl. But for those who have time for more details, I explain that my total includes one brother, one half brother, and two cousins who grew up under one roof with us like they were our brothers. We had all sorts of adventures over the years – from building forts in the woods to epic sock fights (don’t ask) and karate tournaments in New York City (that’s Darius on the left, me next to him, Daniel second from the right, and David on the right). We kicked some booty that day.
My aunt battled with her multiple sclerosis like a champ. Always smiling and making jokes. Always working hard to stay mobile. First she walked with a cane, then a walker, then a wheelchair, and for the last ten years or so she has been bedridden. Didn’t stop her from smiling (most notably when we stuck Burger or Clara in her bed – that always made her giggle). Strongest, bravest and sweetest woman I know.
Yesterday she passed away. It was a very very sad day. So although this might sound like a bummer of a post, I wrote it because I always wanted to remember how amazing and life-changing it was to grow up with such an awesome lady in my life. And I want Clara to be able to read about her Great Aunt Kay Kay someday. She could light up a room then, and thinking about her now brings a smile to my face. Just picturing us all gathered around the breakfast table fills me with nostalgia.
We’ll be back this afternoon with some regular DIY-related fare. In the meantime, feel free to tell/call/text/email/skype the ones you love. Family is such a blessing. And I’m so thankful for the one I got.
CampDallas says
Thank you for such a beautiful post. Your family is in my thoughts and prayers today and in the hard days ahead.
Raelynn says
I’m very sorry to hear about your Aunt! My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family in this time of sorrow. You’re post was amazing though, I’m also pretty sure that its safe to say you made your Aunt proud!!!
Julia says
I am so sorry for your loss. I know how devastating MS can be. My mother in law was diagnosed when my husband was 9 and she quickly could not walk–she had it very bad. When I met her in 2003 she was completely bed ridden. She passed away on January 8, 2010. A month later my husband’s sister found out she was pregnant and a month after that I found out I was pregnant. Sadly, she never got to meet either of her grandsons.
YoungHouseLove says
That is so so sad. I’m so sorry for your loss Julia.
xo,
s
Tamara says
No matter how “different” is your family, they love you and that’s what matters! Thank you for sharing, I think letting it out helps sometimes and also that lets us know who she was. I am sure she is very proud of you, and always will be by your side…
Meera says
So sorry for your loss ..
Adrianne says
What a wonderful memorial to your aunt! Those we love never leave us. My thoughts are with you all!
eileen marie says
Oh wow, Sherry, I just read this. I am so sorry for your loss! I’ll keep you and your family in my thoughts. I hope at least that this was a peaceful, pain-free farewell to a full life for your dear aunt.
Michael Cedrone says
Please accept my condolences for your loss. I too lost a beloved aunt earlier this month, and these past few weeks have been a mix of joyful memories and sad feelings. I will remember your aunt, you, and your family in my thoughts and prayers in the weeks ahead.
Best,
Michael C.
Michele says
I’m so very sorry for your loss. Your post is beautiful and a lovely way to remember such an amazing woman.
Ashley says
Sherry, I am so sorry for the loss of your kind, gentle, beautiful aunt. Your post was such a tender and meaningful celebration of her life and significance to you and your family. Praying peace and comfort for you in the days ahead. Bless you.
Stacey says
Sherry so sincerely sorry for your loss. I read you site every day and have never posted before but felt compelled to after reading this. My Dad continues his struggle with MS and has followed a similar path. It takes a special family to pull together in the face of such a debilitating disease and my heart was warmed by your family story. I shed a tear reading how you honored your aunt. I hope your brother finds a breakthrough. Love and Blessings….
YoungHouseLove says
Me too, Stacey. Me too. Wish all the strength in the world to your dad and our family also.
xo,
s
Crystal says
I’m so sorry for your loss. But what a wonderful story of a sweet family that made you the person you are today. Thoughts & prayers are with you.
Jeanette says
Sorry for your loss. You are so blessed to have a loving family. Thanks for sharing.
Whitney says
So sorry to hear of your loss, what a beautiful post. I am sure she is looking down at you and is so proud that she helped develop you into who you are today.
christen says
Sending out love and thoughts to you and your family. I’m so sorry for your loss, Sherry
Amber says
Hey there…I’m so sorry for your loss. I have been reading your blog this summer and following it regularly (My husband and I are both teachers and we have been tackling some pretty serious projects with much inspiration from you!). I’ve come to feel like I know you and must share that my son has a “Kay-Kay!” I cannot imagine nor have the words to express my sorrow for your family. I just felt led to tell you that my mother in law is also Kay-Kay. My thoughts and prayers are with you!
Thank you for your daily inspiration and for sharing your heart and home with us!
YoungHouseLove says
Please give your Kay-Kay a squeeze for me!
xo,
s
Stephany says
Ill hold you all in my heart this week! My eldest, my son died 4 years ago when he was 7. Every year on his death date- I dedicate the day to his spirit- he was the class clown, loving, but mischievous! So I remember his love his smile and his spirit- and I challenge all our friend and family to celebrate their day that way as well. Although we miss him- we honor him as he lived– not as he died. It makes it a bit easier…..
I am glad you are able to remember your aunts spirit and her love!!
Blessing and peace to you all.
YoungHouseLove says
Oh Stephany, I’m so sorry for your loss. You are an inspiration to me. I love how positive you keep things and how you honor him as he lived.
xo,
s
Sheri says
I’m thinking of you and your family. Much love.
Maureen says
Sherry, what a beautiful tribute to Aunt Kay Kay. My grandma had craptastic MS for almost 50 (!!) years. I never knew her without a wheelchair but know how committed she was to not letting it rule her life. Sounds like your aunt was the same. May she rest in peace.
YoungHouseLove says
Wow. Your grandma sounds like quite the amazing lady!
xo,
s
Briel K. says
So sorry to hear about your loss Sherry! Sounds like she was a great aunt! Xoxo
Emily says
So sorry for your loss, Sherry. Thinking of you and sending lots of love and healing thoughts your way. xoxo
Christine says
I just wanted to send my condolences to you and your family. My husbands uncle passed from MS so I sent him your article to read. He was so touched by your words and how such an ugly disease brought your family closer. Thank you for writing this- it really helped my husband to remember the best times with his uncle and that’s really something very special. We’ll be praying for you over here and hoping those good memories give you comfort, peace, and strength.
YoungHouseLove says
So sorry to hear about your husband’s loss, but I’m glad to hear this post was helpful to him. Thanks for passing it along.
xo,
s
PatC says
I’m so sorry for your loss and that of your brothers / cousins. A Heartbreaking disease, but you have a heartwarming story as a result.
God Bless you and your family Sherry.
I will be thinking and praying for you all.
Penny says
Praying for you and your family Sherry. Your aunt sounds like an incredibly special lady. Thank you for sharing with us and I hope you are comforted by all the love and good wishes from your readers.
Carley says
What a touching post. I’m so sorry for your loss. I have a family member who has been diagnosed very young with MS. We love to see her smile, though we know she’s hurting.
Seriously, this post is beautiful in so many ways!
sheila says
Such a beautiful post, thank you for sharing it with us. I’m keeping you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.
Linda says
I am so sorry for your loss – what a remarkable woman your aunt was, and how blessed your whole family is with love and support for each other, in good times and bad. My thoughts are with you all.
Nicole says
This was a lovely post and I know Clara will cherish reading about her great aunt when she is older… you are a great mom for doing this for her!
Karla@{TheClassyWoman} says
Sherry, I’m so sorry for your loss! Your aunt sounds like a beautiful woman and a shining example of joy & happiness through adversity. :) I’m so glad you got to experience the blessings of “extra” siblings and getting to live with your aunt too, it sounds like you had a lot of fun growing up!
Blessings on your week and may God give you peace about the passing of your aunt. HUGS.
Chrissie says
I am so, so sorry that your family has suffered such a loss. MS is a beast of a disease. But, while it impacted her physically, it sounds like your Aunt Kay Kay dominated that disease throughout her life, not letting it get her down or make her unhappy. It takes a really special person to face something like that with a smile.
You guys were lucky to have her in your lives, but likewise it sounds like she was lucky to be surrounded by such a loving, supportive family. It’s great that you are all so close.
Love to you and yours,
Chrissie
Juju says
So sorry to hear about this, Sherry. It’s clear to me that you grew up under the guidance of two amazing women, your mom and Aunt Kay Kay. I love that your mom was an attorney working her behind off to make partner (I can relate) and that your Aunt Kay Kay was there to support her and take care of the kiddies despite her health issues. That’s family. Thank you for sharing this story. And my sincere condolence to you and your family. Hang in there, Sherry!!
Lisa E says
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. What a blessing to have such a loving and close relationship with your aunt. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
Brandie says
Sherry, what a beautiful post. May your happy memories (and snuggling your beautiful daughter) sustain you as you grieve the loss of your lovely aunt. xo
Mary says
Do you know the song “I Can Only Imagine” by Mercy Me? It always comforts me and maybe it will you. The lyrics are awesome.
YoungHouseLove says
Nope. I’ll have to go Google it!
xo,
s
Kathryn says
Sherry, it sounds like she was a lovely lady, and that you had a lot of love (and brothers!) in your house. I’m so very sorry to hear of your loss. You and your family have a place in my prayers. God bless your hearts! <3
Crystal G. says
Sherry,
I’m so sorry for your loss. Your aunt had very kind eyes and her spirit really resonates in the pictures. Thank you for sharing her story with us.
Yesterday was an anniversary of a day of loss for my family too. It’s been 9 years and the loss still feels just as great as it did on the first day. The loss is still freshly there, but the pain has gotten better.
Thinking of you and yours.
YoungHouseLove says
Thanks Crystal – and so sorry to hear of your loss too.
xo,
s
Stephanie says
You wrote a lovely tribute, and you are a lovely tribute to your sweet aunt. God bless.
Beth A says
Thank you so much for sharing this story about your family.
I’m sorry for your loss, but so glad your were lucky to have your amazing aunt be such a big part of your life.
dominique says
Sherry,
I am so sorry for your loss…..my mom succumbed to MS nearly 5 years ago now, and it is a gut wrenching disease. I’ll tell you though, she had resolve- she could barely write her name but she could crochet a blanket without missing a stitch! Any person I have ever encountered with MS has some other-worldly strength, and it sounds like your Aunt was the same. Best to you and your family!
YoungHouseLove says
So sorry to hear about your mom – but so glad to hear the disease didn’t keep her from her crocheting!
xo,
s
Erin says
So sorry about your aunt/second mom, Sherry. So heartbreaking. My mom has m.s. also (has had it since she was 23 and is now 62) and I think kids of parents with MS have a special bond even if they don’t know each other. And even though we don’t know each other, I am thinking of you and wishing you find peace in the wonderful memories you have of your aunt at this rough time.
YoungHouseLove says
Thanks Erin. Give your mom a squeeze for me!
xo,
s
Heather | Vivid Hue Home says
What a beautiful post and an incredible way to celebrate what sounds like such a remarkable woman. So sorry to hear about your loss. Your Aunt Kay Kay will always live on in your heart and you and your brothers/cousins are blessed to have all had each other growing up. May you all have each other to lean on during this difficult time. Thank you for sharing such a touching and beautiful moment with your readers. xoxo hugs
Jessica says
So sorry to head. My thoughts go out to you and your family. Thankful you had such a great opportunity to have such a close relationship. Because of this, she is a part of you (and you, a part of her), never forget that.
Lisa says
I’m so sorry for your loss. Heartbreaking. A good friend of mine from childhood was diagnosed with MS 2 years ago….such brave, strong people, they are. Prayers for your comfort.
xoxo
Sara C. says
Thank you so much for sharing. That was real sweet. I am so sorry for your lost.
Ellie says
So sorry for your loss, Sherry, your aunt sounds like a beautiful, amazing woman and I am so glad you were able to grow up with her in such an amazingly loving household!
Tracy says
I loved reading about your family and special memories. Thank you for sharing. I was tearing up on the bus on my way to work. (i can only imagine what the person next to me was thinking ;) ) Your aunt is is such a beautiful woman. Condolences to your family.
Wendy B. says
Sherry, I am so sorry for the loss of your beloved aunt. My thoughts and prayers are with your family.
Andrea says
So very sorry, Sherry, for you and your family. My grandmother had MS but battled it bravely for years: one of my nicest memories of her is at my sister’s bat mitzvah, in an electric-blue Chanel-style suit, rocking the dance floor. This was years after she’d been told she only had a few months of mobility left. Our loved ones are our heroes, aren’t they? A big hug through the Intertubes to you.
YoungHouseLove says
Love that visual of your grandmother. She sounds like a fun lady!
xo,
s
Meredith @ La Buena Vida says
Sherry, I’m so sorry.
How awesome to have all these photos AND combine them with the words and stories that you have in this post–a treasure for Clara and everyone else in the family to be able to see!
Jenny says
What a beautiful tribute to your aunt. I’m so sorry for your loss, Sherry. I find it so touching though reading the comments and seeing women finding strength in their own hard times. It’s amazing when we can help people, be it coping with loss or divorce, by just talking about our own experiences. I really love this blog and all you do! xox