One of my favorite things about blogging is keeping it real. Even around the new year when the whole “be the perfect person/wife/family” voices can kick in, I try to fight the good fight and remember that authentic = awesome. And perfect = most likely impossible. So if our house is a mess I’ll make a video to prove it (without even putting my bra away first). If we don’t know how the heck to tackle a project, we’ll admit it (like this). If we fail miserably at an undertaking, we’ll blog alllll about it (like this and this, just to name a few).
We actually love being a DIY diary that’s literally about the good, the bad, and the ugly – because a blog that’s only about the good kind of feels like it’s only telling half of the story. We’re just regular folks attempting to do regular DIY things with a real-person budget while learning as we go. We don’t have any formal training. Five years ago we painted all of our trim the wrong finish, didn’t own a power drill, and our house looked like this:
When we started this blog we were literally DIY beginners, just trying to figure out how to hang curtains and get a good deal on appliances. And although we’ve slowly gained some hands-on experience over the last 4+ years of this blogging thing, I thought I’d start the year (January 17th is still sort of the beginning of the year, right?) by saying a bunch of things out loud to the internet at large that might surprise you. Or maybe not if you really know me.
#1. I don’t have the perfect marriage. It’s amazing how many people ask if John and I ever fight. Is it possible to be married to someone for nearly five years and not fight? Dude, we fight like the best of them! Not loudly in front of Clara, but we definitely can get into it. We’re individuals. Individuals who love each other, but we definitely each have conviction and strong willed tendencies (hello, I’m Italian and from New Jersey). And those convictions and strong willed tendencies can definitely lead to heated discussions, adamant disagreements, and full blown arguments (about anything from a parenting decision to a home improvement snafu). We’re a pretty normal couple I think. We love each other like crazy, but sometimes in the stress of renovating or raising a toddler the moment gets the best of us and we snap. But when we do, we try to remind ourselves that we’re in this together. We both have the same goals (a healthy and well adjusted daughter, and beautiful and safe home, to make each other happy, etc). We’re a team. A sometimes dysfunctional or crabby team, but a team none the less.
#2. I don’t have the perfect child. Sure, there are amazing things about Clara, like how good of a night sleeper she is and how much she loves singing and dancing (and eating funny things like hummus and pickles). But as anyone else who has a 20 month old kid can attest – they’re not all sunshine and roses. Clara cries, teethes, gets mad, throws food, rips magazines, has tantrums, and does all those other things that toddlers do. So yeah, I deal with the same “oh man, she’s sick” or “ack, she’s screaming” or “ohemgee she just threw up an entire pumpkin muffin all over the car seat” issues that every other mom deals with. And let’s not talk about my labor (scariest day of my life) or the 14 months of breastfeeding (I loved it, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say that it took work, energy, and dedication – especially when I was painting and DIYing between those feedings). It’s a good thing she’s totally worth it. I love that bean to pieces. She’s not perfect, but she’s perfect for us.
#3. I make design mistakes (and life mistakes) – all the time! Our rooms and our lives are in a constant state of flux (our first house took us 4.5 years to finish, and we’ve only been here a little over a year) – so sometimes we’re still feeling around in the dark and we make the wrong call. And later we see the light and say “umm, what were we thinking?!” and course correct. I think the key to recovering from mistakes in general (decor-related or otherwise) is not to be married to that mistake. And to attempt to right your wrong. Say you buy the wrong sized rug but don’t realize it for a while (like we did in our living room). Once time passed and we figured out what could be improved, we decided to reuse the old one in another room (or craigslist it) and save our pennies to upgrade it. That approach helped us (and the room) move forward. If we ever become frozen in fear of a mistake that we’ve made (or the fear that we’ll make one) that’s when a room stagnates. We’d never get past decorating mistakes (or life mistakes) if we didn’t learn/adapt/evolve along the way. Our goal is for our house (and ourselves) to always be changing and growing. No freezing in place allowed. Because you usually can’t get around a life obstacle or a DIY debacle if you’re just stuck there standing still.
#4. I’m awkward and probably less cute, stylish, or “put together” than you think. I have paint in my hair and under my nails 24/7 (well, this week it’s grout). My shirts are all stretched out from breastfeeding (yup, still haven’t replaced those). I am covered in dog fur and/or accidentally sporting some smear of jelly/cream cheese/humus five days out of seven. Seriously. Someone chime in here who has met us. We get comments like “I’d freak out and embarrass myself if I ever met you” but I’ve got you covered. I won’t even notice you freaking out over my intense weirdness. Once I spun around at Target and screamed “Chiiiiiistmas stuff is already out!!!” while holding two wooden trees up to my face like Cindy Lou Who to John. But it wasn’t John. It was this woman I’d never seen before standing there staring at me with a baby in her cart. So I tried to smile and quietly make my way to another aisle and she said “Oh my gosh I love your blog” …. and I nearly died of embarrassment. Not only had I been “that crazy person” in front of a stranger, it was someone who “knows” me. So I stuttered and tried to talk about her cute baby and then John and Clara came to my rescue and I stumbled away while mentally kicking myself in the face. Yup, I’m that awkward.
#5. Sometimes I get nervous and insecure about our future. Not gonna lie, being a “small business” (and even more random than that, being a “professional blogger”) is hardly a job with health insurance and a 401K (more on that here and here). We just try to have faith that we’ll end up somewhere ok since we never thought we’d be here five years ago… and here we are. Sure it helps that we saved up a just-in-case cushion (to keep us afloat for 6-9 months) before John left his day job when Clara was born, but I’d be lying if I didn’t shout “yes – we get nervous and uncertain and insecure about what lies ahead sometimes!”
#6. I roll my eyes at myself. I get it. I really do. I am fully aware that I’m obnoxiously enthusiastic. My blog puns often make me gag a little. I’m the less cool version of that adorkable Zooey Deschanel. You know, without the good hair and the great voice and the comedic timing. I’m her half sister Gooey or something. So although my sunny demeanor might make you want to stick a spork in my eye, know that I’m fully aware that I’m annoying – and sometimes I try to rein it in – but I usually just let my freak flag fly. Why? I figure that blogging is all about being yourself and owning it and sharing your life in an authentic way. So I’m not reserved and cool and collected and refined. I’m hyper and giddy and nutty and weird. And 4+ years later that formula just works for us. So gosh darn it, I might call presents “prezzies” or make a crack joke. That’s just how $herdog rolls.
#7. My house is usually a disaster. At any given time, our frame wall might look like this…
… but our sunroom probably looks like this…
There’s always at least one giant pile of something-to-be-sorted somewhere. And don’t even get me started on the playroom. That room is out of control.
So I guess the point of all that soul baring is to assure you that I most definitely do not have it all figured out. I’m just a chick from New Jersey who started a blog who sometimes forgets to take her contacts out at night (I know, I’m so bad). I’m that gal who discovers that I have strawberry cream cheese inexplicably smeared all over the left side of my ear in line at Target. True story. I don’t know it all, and I don’t have it all, and I’m so thankful to be right where I am. Perfection is kinda overrated anyway, right? I’m many things, but most of all: I’m a work in progress. Kinda like our house.
Emily S. says
I love it! I met you once with a co-worker at Anthem’s Stride through Time, you and Clara were a delight and you had just walked a 10k. I was impressed :)
YoungHouseLove says
Aw, I remember! You’re sweet!
xo,
s
Missy G. says
And THIS post is exactly why I love y’all. You’re relatable, you’re imperfect, and you keep it real. And I would say that you’re just like the majority of your readers. I can’t stand to follow a blogger that I feel is hiding something all the time (which is why I’ve never started my own blog; I realize that it takes a lot to put yourself out there like that).
I still kick myself that when I first followed a link to your blog about 3.5 years ago, I didn’t stick around. Heck, I didn’t even know what a blog was, so I looked around, said “super cool wedding,” and then never thought of coming back to the website because I thought I saw everything. Man, oh, man, I was such a dope. So glad that I found y’all again. Love y’all to bits!
Tiffany says
Thanks for keeping it real, $herdog. Like somebody else said, it’s why we keep coming back. P.S. I think you’re funny, not annoying. :)
Meghan, UK says
A really brave, inspirational post. You rock $herdog, chipped nails, fab humour n’ all. Mwah.
Jenn from Much to My Delight says
This post rules for so many reasons. Perfect is boring and it’s your ability to relate to others that makes your blog (and your voice) so very popular. We like you, we really like you!!
Katherine says
Sherry,
You guys are my DIY heroes. Thanks for keeping it real! Also, I have to say “Thank you” for posting on how-to paint dark wood trim white. We definitely used your tips to tackle our project in our finished attic/clubhouse/guestroom the past two weekends. I will tell you that even after using an oil-based primer (that was supposedly “odorless” um except for it so was not), we had to do FOUR coats–one coat primer, three coats of white paint (Olympic Premium Base 2–thank you very much, THL Blog, for the rec!). Annnnnnnnd let me also just say that I, too, had a teary-eye moment when I realized that two coats of white paint just wasn’t going to cut it. But, after 30 hours of painting–it’s done!
Anyway, I’ve never commented on your blog before and I gotta admit I got a lot of love for the YHL-ers. The tile backsplash looks great and so does the house. Keep it up!
Katherine S.
PS: I also confess you and your blog had me at !!!!!!!! Meaning, I, too, and a HUGE, HUGE fan of the humble exclamation point. It! Is! The! Best!
YoungHouseLove says
Haha, I can’t resist! They just keep coming!!!!!
xo,
s
KRISTY says
This post is exactly why we look forward to reading your blog. Can’t wait for the book!
karen says
your cream cheese story immediately brought me to ‘something about mary’!! HAHA! i love you $herdog..never change.
Sarah says
It’s posts like this that make me feel so much more connected to your blog! I love the DIY and the fact that we’re at the same point in our parenting journey (I’ve had the in-public realization of kids food somewhere on my visible person so, so many times).
Keep on keepin’ on.. you guys are magnificent.
Jen Migonis says
This was the most wonderfully refreshing post… I love to know you fight about all the normal things (that sounds weird, but its true). Don’t you hate it when you realize you have food smeared on your face after going to the store… I had crumbs all over the side of my face after going to the grocery store last night but didn’t notice it till hours later. Ugg. Love the authenticity, the decorating mistakes and everything else. Your imperfection, yet how you attempt to stylishly get over it, is an inspiration. :)
Micha says
What a great post!
There is that inherent danger of the DIY/home improvement/home design culture to create a world in which a gaggle (murder? flock? herd?) of Stepford wives try to “keep up with the Joneses.”
Thank goodness it’s not so and thank you for keeping it real :o)
Kasey M. says
Thank you so much for sharing. I may just print out this post and frame it for the next time I’m having a melt down about how I don’t “measure up.” Love to know that there is a real life behind all the styled pictures and adorable Clara and Burger videos.
Christy K says
I can not stop laughing at #4! LOL That is so me… except without the part about someone who knows me. ;) Love this!
Megan says
Thank you for this! It’s so good to here someone speak the truth. Makes me love you even more.
Michelle says
Think I love you guys even more now. Thanks for the honesty:)
Carissa says
I heart you, $herdog! If you’re Gooey, then I’m Mooey, or something.
Amen especially to the design mistake thing. Best part about being frugal is that at least you didn’t spend $5K on a rug that doesn’t work, right? That’s how I’ve learned how to make decisions instead of being paralyzed about possibly making a mistake.
Sarah H. says
Love this post! Your puns and jokes crack me up and I love your positive attitude!. And Clara is adorable, even though she’s not “perfect”!
georgia says
Yo $herdog! Love the post, keepin it real!
Carrie @DreamGreenDIY says
This blog post is perfect. Or “perfectly real” I should say. Thank you SO much for your honesty – It is much-appreciated by this little blogger who needs to be reminded every now and then that imperfection is really the bee’s-knees =)
meg says
$herdog, you (and your family and your blog) make my heart happy. As I like to say to my friends (though I probably don’t say it enough), I’m glad you exist. And if I ever saw you in Target, I would totally grab two wooden trees and hold them up to my face and walk around with you (trees up, of course) looking for John and Clara.
denise says
Pfft. You know, I’ve been reading your blog for years now, and this is the first blog post that’s an utter lie!!!! You’re perfect, $sherdog! You’re my shero!! Please don’t publish any more untruths like this again!!! ;)
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- you’re funny! I promise I’m epically flawed!
xo,
s
Suzanne Supplee says
My favorite post ever. Glad to know I’m not alone in the lack of perfection dept. xo
Laura Jane says
I was glad to see the state of your sunporch and playroom. Our sunporch has half of a ripped out shower and a random used vanity. It also had a toilet for a while until we reinstalled in our bathroom. I have no clue how to throw part of a plastic-y shower away.
Karen @ bellacarina.com says
Thanks for keepin’ it real! I just started my blog, but I was telling my friends that the wonders of photos and blogging is that you can push all the crap out of the way and take a picture! Haha! And you can do projects in your PJ’s and no one will ever know (well, they will now after reading my comment!) These posts are great though…it’s like finding out that models in magazines are photoshopped…we can all breathe a little easier knowing you aren’t perfect. :)
Dona says
I so understand the jelly cream cheese thing. I caught a reflection of myself at the Target checkout to see I was still wearing my dust mask on my head. Apparently, I had been wearing it the better part of my day and my kids actually let me walk out of the house like that!!!
Mona says
ahhahaa….Gooey!!! So freaking funny.
Jill says
Yes! Hilarious!
Allison says
My soul bearing comes in the form of stupid stuff that blurt out of my mouth sometimes and my husband unfortunately never forgets them and uses it against me forever…
Just yesterday I had a stupid moment, but thankfully my husband wasn’t there and hopefully my parents will never tell him. My parents and I were going out to lunch, I was driving, and my dad was telling me something, but I couldn’t really hear him over the radio. Instead of using the volume button to turn down the radio, I for some reason attempted to use it to turn my dad’s voice up.
Yep, we all have our moments. :) Thanks for sharing yours with all of us!
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- John tried to lower the volume of Clara’s baby monitor with the TV remote last night!
xo,
s
tina says
common folk… just like the rest of us…that’s why i love you guys!!
tinajo says
Well, you still didn´t scare me away..! :-D
MacKenzie says
Preach it sista.
Amber says
Great post!
What exactly is happening in the picture of Clara? It looks a little like her tongue is stuck to a giant sequined heart.
YoungHouseLove says
She’s crying because she’s tired while holding a glittered red pear from HomeGoods. Poor girl.
xo,
s
Cathy says
this post makes me happy!! :)
Dixie Redmond says
I love it when people are real. Thanks for sharing.
Jodee B says
This is by far my most favorite post you’ve posted. Mostly because you remind me so much of myself. haha. I’m also a Italian girl from Jersey. Represent! This blog is by far my most favorite and definitely one of the best on the internet. You are amazing just the way you are, $herdog! ;)
Katreena says
You are not alone…my son was born over 2.5 years ago and I have yet to replace my stretched out t-shirts from 13 months of breastfeeding.
Melo says
I loved it and it made me laugh. Love and laugh in the same comment? You definitely must be doing something right! :-)
Nancy says
Thanks for keeping it real, Sherry. I was worried that you all had the perfect, charmed life.
If if makes you feel any better, I found some barbecue in my hair the other night and I don’t even have a toddler to blame it on. It was just me.
YoungHouseLove says
Hahaha. Hilarious. I’m totally guilty of that too (pre Clara). Now I just have someone to pin it on.
xo,
s
Sarah says
Thanks for the realistic view of your life! I love peering in on the “blog”-version of your life, but it’s great to know that you don’t aspire to perfection. Even if you don’t have it entirely figured out, you’ve provided a lot of inspiration to a lot of readers (we painted our paneled wall with your advice!) and have given us the confidence to try the whole DIY homeowner thing. :)
AmiDawn says
i think you might have just described me and my life (but just without the successful blog or the baby stuff!) thanks for keepin it real :)
Erin @ Domestic Adventure says
I love this post, Sherry! Love it.
Kelly says
Aw, Sherry. :) This post is great- thanks for the “peak behind the perfectly-hemmed curtains”. It’s funny, I never expect people to justify themselves as messy human beings. Even those bloggers who have the best personal, uh, “marketing” campaigns, I always assume that they have, at one point in their lives, farted on the subway.
This post reminds me of my favorite Rumi quote, which I repeat to myself whenever I feel uncertain or insecure, “Out beyond ideas of wrong doing and right doing, there is a field; I’ll meet you there.”
I’ll meet you there Sherry!
Karen C. says
Love this post! I firmly believe that life is what you make of it and that beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What is perfect for you may not be perfect for everyone, but then it’s not supposed to be, right? If you are happy, then life is good. Thank you for sharing your thoughts, yourself, and all of your DIY-goodness! This blog livens me up every day!
Rebecca - we are large people says
This is my favorite post by you so far Sherry! One of my blogger friends posted about this awhile back – about how, as bloggers, it’s important not to lie by omission, because it’s easy to just present a curated version of our lives, and not reveal the normal stuff! So thank you for being real!
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- such a fun post! I love it!
xo,
s
ashley says
THANK YOU for being so real, honestly:)
Janke says
Because of posts like this one I love this blog so much! Being as imperfect as you are makes you perfect, Sherry! Just stay exactly the way you are, it’s why we all love you!
Jill says
You go girl! I think you’re dork-tastic! I love all your crazy terms, like “pezzies,” and that you find strawberry cream cheese on your ear while you’re at Target. Thanks for reminding us all that the only person we need to be is ourselves.
Briel K. says
You know posts like this only make us love you more right? :) I for one don’t enjoy the perfect seeming blogs as much as the ones that keep it real. It’s refreshing!
TashaunaScott says
Flaws and all we heart you Sherry!
Heather {ModernMealsforTwo} says
These are all reasons why we love your blog (or at least I do… and the 77 other people who have commented so far do). We keep coming back because we’re all awkward and self conscious and excited about the things we love. You’re the best type of virtual friend… even if it is a bit one sided ;)
YoungHouseLove says
Aw, I love you guys all right back. I have lots of virtual BFFs. I’m a lucky lady.
xo,
s
Kristen @ Popcorn on the Stove says
Love this post! Us quirky New Jersey girls need to stick together!