One of my favorite things about blogging is keeping it real. Even around the new year when the whole “be the perfect person/wife/family” voices can kick in, I try to fight the good fight and remember that authentic = awesome. And perfect = most likely impossible. So if our house is a mess I’ll make a video to prove it (without even putting my bra away first). If we don’t know how the heck to tackle a project, we’ll admit it (like this). If we fail miserably at an undertaking, we’ll blog alllll about it (like this and this, just to name a few).
We actually love being a DIY diary that’s literally about the good, the bad, and the ugly – because a blog that’s only about the good kind of feels like it’s only telling half of the story. We’re just regular folks attempting to do regular DIY things with a real-person budget while learning as we go. We don’t have any formal training. Five years ago we painted all of our trim the wrong finish, didn’t own a power drill, and our house looked like this:
When we started this blog we were literally DIY beginners, just trying to figure out how to hang curtains and get a good deal on appliances. And although we’ve slowly gained some hands-on experience over the last 4+ years of this blogging thing, I thought I’d start the year (January 17th is still sort of the beginning of the year, right?) by saying a bunch of things out loud to the internet at large that might surprise you. Or maybe not if you really know me.
#1. I don’t have the perfect marriage. It’s amazing how many people ask if John and I ever fight. Is it possible to be married to someone for nearly five years and not fight? Dude, we fight like the best of them! Not loudly in front of Clara, but we definitely can get into it. We’re individuals. Individuals who love each other, but we definitely each have conviction and strong willed tendencies (hello, I’m Italian and from New Jersey). And those convictions and strong willed tendencies can definitely lead to heated discussions, adamant disagreements, and full blown arguments (about anything from a parenting decision to a home improvement snafu). We’re a pretty normal couple I think. We love each other like crazy, but sometimes in the stress of renovating or raising a toddler the moment gets the best of us and we snap. But when we do, we try to remind ourselves that we’re in this together. We both have the same goals (a healthy and well adjusted daughter, and beautiful and safe home, to make each other happy, etc). We’re a team. A sometimes dysfunctional or crabby team, but a team none the less.
#2. I don’t have the perfect child. Sure, there are amazing things about Clara, like how good of a night sleeper she is and how much she loves singing and dancing (and eating funny things like hummus and pickles). But as anyone else who has a 20 month old kid can attest – they’re not all sunshine and roses. Clara cries, teethes, gets mad, throws food, rips magazines, has tantrums, and does all those other things that toddlers do. So yeah, I deal with the same “oh man, she’s sick” or “ack, she’s screaming” or “ohemgee she just threw up an entire pumpkin muffin all over the car seat” issues that every other mom deals with. And let’s not talk about my labor (scariest day of my life) or the 14 months of breastfeeding (I loved it, but I’d be lying if I didn’t say that it took work, energy, and dedication – especially when I was painting and DIYing between those feedings). It’s a good thing she’s totally worth it. I love that bean to pieces. She’s not perfect, but she’s perfect for us.
#3. I make design mistakes (and life mistakes) – all the time! Our rooms and our lives are in a constant state of flux (our first house took us 4.5 years to finish, and we’ve only been here a little over a year) – so sometimes we’re still feeling around in the dark and we make the wrong call. And later we see the light and say “umm, what were we thinking?!” and course correct. I think the key to recovering from mistakes in general (decor-related or otherwise) is not to be married to that mistake. And to attempt to right your wrong. Say you buy the wrong sized rug but don’t realize it for a while (like we did in our living room). Once time passed and we figured out what could be improved, we decided to reuse the old one in another room (or craigslist it) and save our pennies to upgrade it. That approach helped us (and the room) move forward. If we ever become frozen in fear of a mistake that we’ve made (or the fear that we’ll make one) that’s when a room stagnates. We’d never get past decorating mistakes (or life mistakes) if we didn’t learn/adapt/evolve along the way. Our goal is for our house (and ourselves) to always be changing and growing. No freezing in place allowed. Because you usually can’t get around a life obstacle or a DIY debacle if you’re just stuck there standing still.
#4. I’m awkward and probably less cute, stylish, or “put together” than you think. I have paint in my hair and under my nails 24/7 (well, this week it’s grout). My shirts are all stretched out from breastfeeding (yup, still haven’t replaced those). I am covered in dog fur and/or accidentally sporting some smear of jelly/cream cheese/humus five days out of seven. Seriously. Someone chime in here who has met us. We get comments like “I’d freak out and embarrass myself if I ever met you” but I’ve got you covered. I won’t even notice you freaking out over my intense weirdness. Once I spun around at Target and screamed “Chiiiiiistmas stuff is already out!!!” while holding two wooden trees up to my face like Cindy Lou Who to John. But it wasn’t John. It was this woman I’d never seen before standing there staring at me with a baby in her cart. So I tried to smile and quietly make my way to another aisle and she said “Oh my gosh I love your blog” …. and I nearly died of embarrassment. Not only had I been “that crazy person” in front of a stranger, it was someone who “knows” me. So I stuttered and tried to talk about her cute baby and then John and Clara came to my rescue and I stumbled away while mentally kicking myself in the face. Yup, I’m that awkward.
#5. Sometimes I get nervous and insecure about our future. Not gonna lie, being a “small business” (and even more random than that, being a “professional blogger”) is hardly a job with health insurance and a 401K (more on that here and here). We just try to have faith that we’ll end up somewhere ok since we never thought we’d be here five years ago… and here we are. Sure it helps that we saved up a just-in-case cushion (to keep us afloat for 6-9 months) before John left his day job when Clara was born, but I’d be lying if I didn’t shout “yes – we get nervous and uncertain and insecure about what lies ahead sometimes!”
#6. I roll my eyes at myself. I get it. I really do. I am fully aware that I’m obnoxiously enthusiastic. My blog puns often make me gag a little. I’m the less cool version of that adorkable Zooey Deschanel. You know, without the good hair and the great voice and the comedic timing. I’m her half sister Gooey or something. So although my sunny demeanor might make you want to stick a spork in my eye, know that I’m fully aware that I’m annoying – and sometimes I try to rein it in – but I usually just let my freak flag fly. Why? I figure that blogging is all about being yourself and owning it and sharing your life in an authentic way. So I’m not reserved and cool and collected and refined. I’m hyper and giddy and nutty and weird. And 4+ years later that formula just works for us. So gosh darn it, I might call presents “prezzies” or make a crack joke. That’s just how $herdog rolls.
#7. My house is usually a disaster. At any given time, our frame wall might look like this…
… but our sunroom probably looks like this…
There’s always at least one giant pile of something-to-be-sorted somewhere. And don’t even get me started on the playroom. That room is out of control.
So I guess the point of all that soul baring is to assure you that I most definitely do not have it all figured out. I’m just a chick from New Jersey who started a blog who sometimes forgets to take her contacts out at night (I know, I’m so bad). I’m that gal who discovers that I have strawberry cream cheese inexplicably smeared all over the left side of my ear in line at Target. True story. I don’t know it all, and I don’t have it all, and I’m so thankful to be right where I am. Perfection is kinda overrated anyway, right? I’m many things, but most of all: I’m a work in progress. Kinda like our house.
Jill says
Aw, $herdog – this may be one of my favorite posts that you’ve ever written :) Love it. Yesterday the hubs and I were going to the Woodbridge Ikea, and I decided at the last minute to change out of my sweatshirt (that may or may not have had some drywall/mud dust on it) into what may classify as something “cuter.” My reasons: 1) didn’t want the hubs to be embarrassed of me, and 2) what if we ran into J & S and I wanted to run up and gush to you guys but was too embarrassed to with my not-so-stylish getup?
True (hopefully not too stalkerish) story. Thanks for keeping it real :)
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- aw man I wish we were there so you could see what the heck I was wearing (guaranteed to make you feel better about yourself). Haha.
xo,
s
Erin says
I love every word of this post.
Crystal says
Sherry thanks for this post. Today I was feeling like a failure on the mom and wife front. You pointed out that no one is perfect and we all have our moments. The most important part is loving our family and that I have down pat. I couldn’t image life with out my husband and baby girl.
Shelley @ parenthetic says
All the reasons you are well-loved in blogland. Love the Zooey/Gooey reference. If only we could all be as cool as she is in our own weirdness.
Robyn says
I think one of the greatest qualities in a human is knowing your weaknesses and that youre not perfect and being ok with that. Youre all amazing!
Laura @ Hollywood Housewife says
I’m not a big DIY-er myself, so it’s your real ness that keeps me subscribed to this site.
I loved this post and this glimpse of you.
chari says
AMEN! I used to think that I had to be perfect all the time, so i wouldn’t be in any pictures from my little boys birth until 3 months later- cause i looked gross. BOY DO I REGRET THAT! I wish there were pictures of me in all my puffy post partum glory. Who the eff cares if I don’t look like one of the GLO moms. (Well ME, but whatevs).
It might be part of being a type-a gal that obsesses over everything! Super appreciated this post. You are da bombbbbbbbb :)
Wrenaria says
Aww, but that’s why we love you. You’re so adorkable. ;)
Cheryl says
Whew! I am so glad to hear you say all this. I love your blog and after today, I love it even more. Thanks for being real.
Ann says
Sherry, you remind me of my mom who has the same name and who laughs at her own jokes hysterically in a store aisle even when no one heard the joke in the first place. In fact, if we lived closer, we would have to do lunch… Thanks for sharing.
melissa says
i just had to tell you that the target christmas sale made me snort-laugh at my computer desk. i had to act like someone texted me something funny and that i wasn’t reading a blog. :) i’m sorry but that was HILARIOUS. i can just imagine.
also, you may feel like you’re awkward or annoying or whatever…but you come across as funny, super nice (in the most non-annoying way), and genuine. i’m pretty sure that anyone who reads your blog wants to be your bff! so stop feeling that way! :)
seansmom says
Perfect people are boring and make the rest of us look bad… So glad you’re “one of us” instead! ha ha!! I enjoy the fact that you don’t take yourselves too seriously. There are times when the two of you remind me of myself and hubby when we’re working on something around here. Try to take that as a compliment… LOL!!
Lisa Bump-Riley says
this is exacly what keeps me coming back to your blog, along with all the great ideas, thank you for reminding us that you both are just like the rest of us, REAL and human….but we all know that this post is secretly just an attempt to get the Sherdog name to stick. LOL!! :)
YoungHouseLove says
Haha- it’s so true. I’m trying to brand $herdog. Is it working?
xo,
s
MJB says
I’m the exceptions when I say I don’t think we’d be BFFs in real life… I’m at least a decade older, have middle school kids and am much more laid back (read: lazy). But I love the personality you and John both bring to the blog. As someone who treats a couch purchase as an almost life and death decision (craaaazy, I know), I have learned from your attitude in #3.
Kristen M says
Thank you for such an honest post! I personally see you as far more accomplished than DIYers at this point, especially with Clara around. We can hardly get our baby gates to stay in the wall (seriously at least 8 installs, with at least 4 different holes, for each one and I noticed one started to fall out of the wall this week). You guys totally inspire me (and help me realize my limitations as well – still trying to get spray painting down ;) ). And I loved the part about your appearance – as a mom of 2, I HEAR you! And for the next one, you should totally get some nursing tops! They are so soft and you don’t have to stretch them. My favorites are from this company http://www.milkstars.com/, but there are other good ones too! I still wear mine even though my son weaned last June.
YoungHouseLove says
Ooh thanks for the link Kristen!
xo,
s
Rebecca says
Glad to hear that YOU are happy with you, $herdog! (I am sure John and Clara are happy about that too!)
Sarah @ Redhead in Ruffled Flats says
Sherry, this post makes you even more perfect and put-together than I thought you were.
:P
Just kidding – what I love about you two is that you are completely real. You are people just like us who are doing awesome (and scary) things that you pour your heart into. I love your personality (I’m a crazy redhead that fits the redheaded stereotype) and am glad you are true to yourself!
Kristen says
Oh $herdog! I loved this post. And as always, you went the extra mile. Yes it was a keepin-it-real post, but you gave details and just had a this-is-reality attitude. A lot of people write similar types of posts, but then make excuses, apologize, blame, whatever, so a nice idea becomes kind of a negative post! But not you! You’re enthusiasm for everything you write about is what makes us all read you every single day! Keep on keepin’ on! :-)
DawnSC says
I absolutely love this post. I recently went back to work after maternity leave. I’m still struggling with leaving my baby, when I just want to spend all day with him. That, combined with making sure I get to work with my hair combed and my shoes matching (each other, bonus if they match my outfit :-P), PLUS making time for my husband, furry child, and house stuff… Well, just another huge thanks for making me feel better about realizing I can’t do it all, let alone do it all perfectly! And also thanks for making me laugh out loud at the target story, I’ve definitely done things like that before. :)
pippin says
Haha. Thanks for keeping it real. I sometimes do think you guys are super human. I am newly married, and my husband and I are buying our first house soon. Your blog will remind me that yes, couples will argue about decorating and remodeling.
Leigh Anne says
I think I speak for everyone who has a messy house from time-to-time (or most of the time) when I say, “We salute you!”
Kat says
In the course of today, a simple oil change resulted in two expensive new tires, I found out my grandmother is not recovering well from the flu, and my beloved bulldog Maisey is sick. Yesterday was an epic fail in trying to remove wallpaper from my “new” 50 year-old-house, and I now have to learn how to handle joint compound to fix it. I’m rushing Maisey to a vet appointment in 1/2 hour, and what do I do with my time? Call my awesome friends? Distract myself with my great job? Nope. I come check out younghouselove – because it’s pretty to look at, and to dream about creating in my own home. That’s true. But it’s also because of your humility, and your honesty, and your gracious sharing of yourselves with such friendliness and openness. In fact, the first time I ever commented on here, I was worried that I’d inadvertently criticized your photo-taking abilities in my curiosity about the kind of blinds you have! You were quick with a reply that was helpful and kind. Can’t speak for the rest of the world, yet that’s why I really enjoy and find inspiration in you and your family. Joint compound may hide or fix flaws, yet honesty and genuine warmth and love make a real life. Thanks for sharing!
YoungHouseLove says
Aw Kat, that makes me tear up! I hope your grandmother is feeling better soon and little Maisey is bounding around with her tail a-wagging! So sweet of you to drop in on us in the middle of a crazy day.
xo,
s
Mila @ loftyappetite says
This post sums up why your blog has been such a success. I love that it’s so real, and I love it for both a good laugh and home DIY tips! Your Target story is so funny!
Wom Mom Ethne says
Super cute. I revealed my disastrous bedroom in a blog post. Super embarassing – I called it ‘final frontier’ since I had been avoiding cleaning it (ie, my clothes) since my kids were born. But agreed, that’s the good stuff. Perfect is no fun.
schmei says
Turns out the real $herdog is even cooler than the “practically perfect” Sherry. :-)
Stacy says
I kind want to do a big air jump kick the feet out Laverne and Shirley style high five with you now. Except we have a significant height difference and I’m afraid with our combined awkwardness someone may end up moderately injured…so let’s keep it virtual. Anyway, thanks for the early pics of house #1 it makes me feel a heck-of-a-metric-crap-ton better about my 6 months in decor.
YoungHouseLove says
Bwahahahahaha. Let’s keep it virtual = hilarious.
xo,
s
DawnSC says
you just made my day with “metric-crap-ton”. because if you’re going to be specific, you might as well use that over “short-crap-ton”. hehe. :)
Meg @ Meg, Acting Out says
Agreed – so descriptive! I vote this “best comment”. :-)
Jess says
Just curious what brought on this post? Have you been getting snarky comments about your “perfect life?”
I do have to say that I did enjoy this post. I check your blog daily because I love it so much, but there are times it depresses me for whatever reason or another. For instance, I would love to take on more projects but our budget doesn’t allow me. And I also have 2 children under 3 and work full time so free time doesn’t allow me. It’s nice to be reminded that the reason you accomplish so much is because this IS your full time job and we all shouldn’t be jealous so easily! :)
YoungHouseLove says
Haha, it definitely wasn’t brought on by snarky comments. I just love the whole aspect of keeping it real. The entire draw for blogging for both J and I was just sharing whatever we’re thinking and not trying to be glossy or too polished. So I was thinking it would be fun to do a “real me” post where I sort of share/embrace all the imperfect things that make up my life. I’d love for J to do the same thing!
xo,
s
Meg says
Thanks so much for this post! It picked me up on a day when I was feeling pretty down on myself for who I am. Thanks for the perspective and ability to take a deep breath. :-) It’s good to know that others are dealing with their insecurities, regardless of how “cool” they truly are.
Urban Wife says
Thanks for your honesty. Personally, I fall into the trap of thinking that you guys (among other bloggers out there) just have it going on, perfectly together. Instead of idolizing what I see on the screen in front of me, it’s refreshing to know that indeed, you guys are pretty normal. Whatever normal means, anyway. Have a lovely day! :)
Nicki says
Thank you for being you! My family is between homes, so we are living with another family member right now. That, along with many challenging life changes, has been extremely stressful. Your blog has been a place where I can escape to for a laugh and some major home improvement inspiration. Cannot wait to get into my new home so that I can use it. Thank you for being a bright spot in my days.
YoungHouseLove says
Aw Nicki, that’s so nice. You’re making me grin like a fool. All these sweet comments are a bright spot in our days. Couldn’t blog without you guys! That’s for sure.
xo,
s
Chris O. says
I’m not a jealous person but I always envied you and John….everything I would read on your blog screamed perfection. Now you’ve put everything into perspective and reading this post brought a smile to my face.:o)
GreenInOC says
$herdog – Authentically Awesome.
Yes, you may use that for your new t-shirt!
In my humble and useless opinion, I think the the authenticity is why most people start their day off with YHL.
Rena says
You are absolutely wonderful for sharing this post! I am a type A recovering perfectionist. Through this blog (as well as the nesting place) I have been able to change my mindset and ways, and embrace the fact that progress is far better than perfection. I was stagnant for quite sometime, waiting for conditions to be perfect in order to move forward (mostly financially but pretty much overall). I slowly realized how incredibly lame it was to not do anything and wait for a perfect moment that didn’t seem to be coming. I was unhappy and at a standstill. I now actually love the crazy storm of mess before the beautiful quiet after (opposite of quiet before the storm). Thanks guys! Some other helpful resources for me were unclutterer and simplify 101 but I do have to really thank the nester for giving me the mantra “It doesn’t have to perfect to be beautiful”. Ah, makes my mind feel at ease just typing it!
Rebecca @This Nest is Best says
I love this post. It’s like an honest cathartic therapy session in blogland. I love that you guys share the good, the bad, and the ugly. It’s so easy when writing a blog to focus on the “good stuff” – not just for your readers, but for yourself :) There are many reasons that Young House Love is one of my favorite blogs, but stuff like this is definitely a part of it. Thank you!
trish says
Love you all just the way you are! Secretly though, I would love to see a video of you mad!!! lol
Megan says
“Damn girl, you are a writer” to quote one of my favorite movies! The funny thing is my three-year-old picks up on all my craziness now. My rhyming and shortening of things is rubbing off. He was playing with his Batman and I hear, “Don’t forget your capey wapey”….Whoops! Think I messed up my 3 y.o. for life :)
Sheens says
You are awesome. You bring smiles and giggles out of me. All from a home improvement site? Weird indeed. Keep ’em coming!
snosie says
Go on… call them prezzies… you’ll feel aussie-esque!
I love that you’re real (and you post uber regularly, and you’re not spruiking products every second post (cause really most of them aren’t available here in Australia)). It also helps that you make stuff ‘pretty’ in the way I like (cause I’m not shabby chic cottage-esque).
I’m only slightly intimidated every time you say you’re type A (took me a while to realise… you’re uber perfectionist, and alas I’ve let that slide, since, well, year 2 report card said ‘could slow down and focus on the details’) But I like you write a blog, and you do it right, so at least it’s a ‘best’ of… and we can all settle for ‘a little better’ of!
liz @ bon temps beignet says
Oh my gawd. Your target story is PRICELESS. I’m 40 weeks and 2 days pregnant and nearly lost my bladder for the first time during this whole pregnancy.
Awesome.
M.C. Sommers says
Thanks for posting photos of your messy home. I can never seem to get the entire house clean at one time. (And when people come over I just have to shove things into closets.) Your blog is like the only one I read these days so thanks for keeping it real.
Andrea B says
Love it. Thanks for keeping it real. It’s a good reminder to all of us that DIY isn’t always perfect, but it’s always great!
Lindsay F says
Sherry, we wouldn’t want you any other way!!
xo
Kendra says
Saw this ornament on Mod Clothe. I think Burger needs it. http://www.modcloth.com/shop/room-wall-decor/drive-thru-diva-ornaments
YoungHouseLove says
Oh my gosh, you won’t believe it but I already have it! We got it in honor of Burger last year and even used it on our advent calendar this year!!
xo,
s
Lisa says
Sherdog,
I think the ending couple of sentences of #1 negate your statement. That there is the definition of a perfect marriage. You aren’t all cream cheese and roses because that isn’t life. Life is messy and dirty and fun and if you have someone you can scream at who knows and loves you through and through, that is a perfect marriage that we all should want.
Lisa
Marlena says
Ha! Gooey! I appreciate this so much. I so look forward to reading your blog twice a day, and this makes it so much more neat for me. Thanks for keeping it real, $herdog.
Ashley @ The North Carolina Cowgirl says
Loved how real you were in this post! I just recently started my own blog with the hopes that in a few years I could have a small “on the side” income. Thanks for how real you keep it and for everything you share with us! :)
Lizzy says
Love this post! Can we expect a post about “The Real John” soon?
YoungHouseLove says
I’m totally begging John to play along! Soon, hopefully!
xo,
s
Janie says
I read all the time but never bother to comment, but had to here – thanks for keeping it real. Especially about the marriage/kid stuff.
You did “forget” one thing though – Burger! Clearly, that dog actually IS perfect, haha.
YoungHouseLove says
Oh yes, that’s why we didn’t mention him. Hahah. Perfection on four legs!
xo,
s
Jessica says
Sherry! thank you for this open and honest post. I don’t care how awkward you might think you are, I still think it would be awesome to run into you in Target! haha. And as a new blogger, I think it is great advice to hear that just being yourself is the formula that worked for you. Your authenticity comes through so naturally, and it is what keeps me coming back here 1, 2 or 10 times a day!
cheers
Nicole says
Love this!! Thanks for sharing :)