Over the years of jabbering on about house stuff I occasionally get questions about my family. How many siblings I have, how I grew up, etc. I always say it was a somewhat un-traditional childhood… in the best possible way. I was raised by my mom and dad, who split up when I was very young (a few years after my younger brother Daniel was born) so we just had two houses and bounced happily between them.
I remember when a kid at school once teased me for having divorced parents and I put the “I have two houses and you only have one and I get double the holiday presents” spin on it. Looking back, it was a moment of pure genius. Haha. No more teasing.
I also grew up with my half brother Adam, who was born after my dad married my step mom Nina a while later (he was 11 years younger than me). You might remember him from his cameo in the most embarrassing moment ever caught on film when I was 17.
But I always say I’m the oldest of five – and the only girl. So where do the other two fit in? Well, my Aunt Kay Kay (as we lovingly call my mom’s sister) and her two sons named David and Darius actually moved in with us when my brother and I were very young (my brother was 3 and I was 6). My mom is one of seven children, and while many of my aunts and uncles lived closer, Aunt Kay Kay and her kids used to live in Maryland, so we didn’t get to see our cousins very often, who were 2 and 4 at the time when they moved in… which was just one of about a million reasons we were SO excited for them to move in with us.
My aunt had been diagnosed with a craptastic disease called Multiple Sclerosis, so raising all four of us under one roof with my mom was a way that my mom could lend a hand to my aunt and also a way that my aunt could help us. My mom’s an attorney, and back in those days she was working her buns off to make partner at her firm, so she often got home late. So it was great to come home to my aunt after school, and on most nights she cooked us dinner and helped us with our homework. It was kind of a crazy house with four kids so close in age (four kids born within five years), but growing up with them honestly made me who I am today. Here’s my Aunt Kay Kay with me and my cousin David in the pool when we were little. Isn’t she beautiful?
My aunt was always laughing. She was “the nice one” while I, being the oldest of all the boys, proudly wore my title as “the bossy one.” My brother was “the smart one,” my cousin Darius was “the funny one,” my cousin David was “the crazy one,” and my mom was “the strict one.” So you can guess that when it came down to asking an adult if we could do something… well, we’d usually ask my aunt before my mom.
It was an odd little madhouse, but it was our madhouse and we loved it. So when people ask me how many siblings I have, I usually just say that I’m the oldest of five, and the only girl. But for those who have time for more details, I explain that my total includes one brother, one half brother, and two cousins who grew up under one roof with us like they were our brothers. We had all sorts of adventures over the years – from building forts in the woods to epic sock fights (don’t ask) and karate tournaments in New York City (that’s Darius on the left, me next to him, Daniel second from the right, and David on the right). We kicked some booty that day.
My aunt battled with her multiple sclerosis like a champ. Always smiling and making jokes. Always working hard to stay mobile. First she walked with a cane, then a walker, then a wheelchair, and for the last ten years or so she has been bedridden. Didn’t stop her from smiling (most notably when we stuck Burger or Clara in her bed – that always made her giggle). Strongest, bravest and sweetest woman I know.
Yesterday she passed away. It was a very very sad day. So although this might sound like a bummer of a post, I wrote it because I always wanted to remember how amazing and life-changing it was to grow up with such an awesome lady in my life. And I want Clara to be able to read about her Great Aunt Kay Kay someday. She could light up a room then, and thinking about her now brings a smile to my face. Just picturing us all gathered around the breakfast table fills me with nostalgia.
We’ll be back this afternoon with some regular DIY-related fare. In the meantime, feel free to tell/call/text/email/skype the ones you love. Family is such a blessing. And I’m so thankful for the one I got.
Fran says
So sorry for your loss, Sherry. She sounds like an amazing person, thank you for sharing with us
Ashleigh says
Sherry,
Stories like these – real stories- bring so many people together. Life is so tough, for so many, for no seemingly real reason. Thanks for sharing the personal moment… it reminded me to reflect on my family, which make me smile and help me make it every day.
Susan says
I’m so sorry for your loss. Kay Kay sounds like a fantastic lady who left an indelible mark. A beautiful tribute to her and the gift she was to your family.
Keep On S'myelin! says
Thank you for sharing such a lovely post. I have Multiple Sclerosis and can understand the what she had to battle on a daily basis. Positivity always gives me strength and is sometimes the best medicine. It’s wonderful to hear that your aunt kept smiling through her journey. I thought I would share The Spoon Theory with you if you haven’t already read it. I use it often to describe how I feel on a daily basis…
The Spoon Theory
http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory-written-by-christine-miserandino/
YoungHouseLove says
Thanks for sharing that link. A very interesting (and humbling) description indeed.
xo,
s
keapdx says
I’m so sorry… what a wonderful portrait of a brave woman and, from the evidence of her handiwork in you, a marvelous parent. Condolences to all the folks who are your family.
Lynn @ Our Useful Hands says
I’m sorry that you lost your Aunt to such a terrible thing Sherry. No one should ever have to deal with such a thing. It’s such a blessing that you got to spend so much time with her during her life through the good times and the bad. You and your family will be in my prayers tonight dear.
My best, Lynn
DONNA says
Sherry,
This morning after reading your post I wanted to leave a comment immediately but was unable to download the page. So here I am unable to go to bed until I express my deepest sympathy to you and your family. Your words were so heartfelt, your pictures, a beautiful memory and a precious glimpse into your young life. Your beloved Aunt will be sorely missed…but how lucky you are to have experience such a full and happy life with her. May she rest in peace.
YoungHouseLove says
Thanks for taking the time to come back Donna. And sorry about the little server glitch this morning.
xo,
s
Ann Marie says
((((HUGS))))
Elise says
I’m sorry for your loss. Just said a prayer for you and your family. May the peace of God be with you.
jillian says
I am so sorry for your loss. I grew up surrounded by illness, and it taught me so much. I was so moved by your story. Thanks for sharing and all the best as you cope with the loss of your aunt.
Jill says
Sherry, I’m so sorry for your loss. Your aunt sounds like she was an amazing lady. Her kindness and strength were clearly an inspiration to you and your family. It seems to me that while she was living these qualities, she was also teaching them to you by example. When you share a kind word or patiently endure a difficult situation, you exhibit kindness and strength. I pray it brings you comfort to remember that she was one of the people in your life who taught you to live this way. My thoughts and prayers are with you. May God fill you and your family with peace and love during this difficult time.
Ingrid says
Sherry,
I am so sorry for your loss – your aunt sounds like a very special person.
Thank you for such a beautifully written post – my thoughts are with you and your family.
Danette from Oz says
*hugs* to you all xx
Justin's says
What a wonderful, uplifting post. It sounds like you had a great childhood with a loving family around you. Your aunt sounds like a lovely lady.
I’m sorry for your loss and send my condolences to you and all the family.
Melissa says
I’m very sorry for your loss, Sherry.
Katy @ The Non-Consumer Advocate says
Sherry,
I am very moved by your story, and so sad to hear the news of your lovely aunt.
You are very loved.
Camille says
Sorry for your loss Sherry, she sounds like she was an amazing lady.
Christine Witt (Brush Dance) says
I am sorry for your loss. It is such a difficult thing to lose someone so dear.
Benita says
I’m so sorry for your loss, Sherry. Hugs!!!
Bryony says
That was a gorgeous post, Sherry! I’m sorry to hear about your aunt’s passing, but she obviously lives on in the impact she made on all of you and the great memories you have of her. I always used to worry about trying to explain my parents’ divorce to any kids I had, but now I just enjoy the fact that my son has 6 grandparents who all love him to bits. Thanks for sharing!
Sarah says
I’m so sorry for your loss, but you are so lucky to have had such a lovely person in your life. x
Emily says
Sherry,
I am so sorry for your loss. I am awake right now in a house full of sleeping family including my two precious little boys, mourning my mom who died yesterday morning just one week after getting a cancer diagnosis. Like your aunt, my mom was an amaxing woman full of love who triumphed when others would have fallen.
I read your blog regularly and feel like I know you from your posts. I’ve been absent this past week and came back for some distraction but instead found companionship in a time of sorrow. Thank you for sharing your story. Your family is in my thoughts.
Warmly,
Emily
YoungHouseLove says
As is yours, Emily! So sorry to hear about your mom. Hopefully some of the uplifting comments here will be as helpful to you as they have been to me.
xo,
s
Lili says
Hey Sherry,
I love your blog and read it everyday and its comforting knowing that I’m not the only girl that has gone through this horrible disease. My mother has it, and shes so strong and I’m so proud of how far shes come. You and your family are in my hearts and thoughts, stay strong xo
YoungHouseLove says
Thanks Lili – sending some love to your and your mom too.
xo,
s
Hannah says
It so lovely that you shared this, I just adore hearing about all the happenings of you and your families decorating adventures and I was so sadden to read your post, your aunty would be so proud of what you have achieved and by sharing your memories of what sounds like an incredible woman you are helping to keep her present in your everyday, my heart goes out to you and your family in this difficult time ox
Karo says
I’m sorry for your loss Sherry. This post was a beautiful homage to your aunt.
JoDi says
What an extra special family to grow up in! It really sounds like an amazing experience, and you were all such a blessing to each other.
That last picture of your aunt reminds me so much of my great aunt who died from breast cancer 4 years ago. She was always dressed to the 9’s with hair and nails done. She was a wonderful sweet woman who never married or had children so she treated all of us nieces like her own. I still miss her a lot so I can only imagine how much you miss your sweet aunt right now. Sending you some big hugs!
YoungHouseLove says
So sorry for the loss of your aunt. She sounds like a hoot!
xo,
s
Pam C says
I’m praying for you and your family.
Those memories are now treasures.
cindy says
What a touching post…I am really so sorry for your loss…it really sucks to lose someone you love dearly.
Lori @ Lighten Up! says
Sherry – What a beautiful tribute to your aunt. She sounds like an amazing woman. Hugs to all of you.
I started having MS symptoms four years ago, and was diagnosed with Progressive MS last summer. I decided to use it to my advantage, to remind myself to seize the day and start living my best life. I don’t succeed, most days :-) but I did take time from work to go on a six-month tour of Europe with my husband and daughter. (Gotta do it before I need a cane!) We’ve been traveling since March, and it’s been such a special time. I really appreciate your stories of your aunt, and of how she was able to impact others in such a positive way even while dealing with such a “craptastic” disease.
YoungHouseLove says
Wow Lori, what a positive spin you’ve put on things. Hope you enjoy your travels to the fullest!
xo,
s
Jen says
So sorry for your loss, thanks for sharing the story. I have an aunt and uncle with MS, it’s a terrible disease.
Heidi says
I’m so sorry to read about your aunt passing away. I’m sure all of your wonderful memories of times spent with her through the years will bring you so much comfort in the days ahead. God bless you and your sweet family!
Mel says
Thank you for sharing such a beautiful story. Your aunt is a wonderful woman. I am sorry for your loss. You and your family will be in my prayers.
kalibrooke says
so sorry for your loss, sherry. sounds like you had an amazingly special and somewhat unique experience growing up with your extended family, though—and what wonderful memories to have from that! rest in peace, aunt kay kay.
Elizabeth@ Food Ramblings says
Thinking of you and your family! So glad you have so many happy memories with your aunt!!
Jules says
Im so sorry for your loss. I will have you and your family in my thoughts today xoxo
Lesli says
So sorry for your loss. Thank you for writing that MS is definitely a disease you can live with. It sounds like it did not stop your aunt from doing anything! What a lovely tribute.
tami says
thanks so much for sharing this!it is sad, but so wonderful to hear about the joy your aunt brought to your life. so sorry for your loss.
Katherine says
Sherry, just saw this post this morning and bah. :( I’m so, so sorry. Wishing you guys lots of hugs and love. It sounds like she was a wonderful lady–and thank you for sharing her story with us. Those old photographs are so sweet. <3
Misty @ 2brokebruces says
“Every life is noted and is cherished; nothing loved is ever lost or perished” -Madeline L’Engle
So sorry for your loss, you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. It is always hard for those of us who are left behind by our loved ones, but wonderful to know that they will always live on in our hearts!
YoungHouseLove says
Beautiful quote. Thanks to everyone for the outpouring of love. It has been amazing.
xo,
s
Virginia Middlebrook says
Thank you for sharing your wonderful and beautiful aunt with us.
Jordan says
So sorry for your loss. Praying for you and your family! And, Sherry, you are just gorgeous!
Scott says
Sherry,
What a great way to honor your aunt by sharing her memory with the world. MS is indeed a craptastic disease. My husband’s father passed away from it when my husband was 12 and the hardest part for the family was seeing the continual and gradual decline of his health. I’m happy to report that they cherish his memory and celebrate his life often. I wish the same for your family. May you have strength & uplifting thoughts as you work through this grief.
Hugs,
Scott & Chad
Jennifer says
Thanks for sharing that was a great tribute to your aunt and brought tears to my eyes. Please believe she is still with you in spirit and will watch over you all. My prayers go out to you and your family during this time. xoxo
Jeinfer Moseman says
First off, I am so very sorry for your loss.
Good Bye is never easy, it sucks actually.
Your Aunt Kay Kay sounded wonderful and you were so blessed to have someone like her in your life :)
I too had a loss this year. My sister battled cancer the past 3 1/2 years with such bravery. We were close friends and I loved her very much. She was 46. Muddling through this thing called grief is slow, painful, and very surreal at times.
Take time for yourself and surround yourself with the people you love.
Prayers to all of Aunt Kay Kay’s family and friends.
YoungHouseLove says
Oh Jenifer, I’m so sorry for your loss. Thanks to everyone for sending us love and sharing their stories. You feel like family, which is amazing.
xo,
s
Laura J says
I’m so sorry for your loss
jessica@fourgenerationsoneroof says
Oh so sorry to hear about your loss. I really enjoyed looking at your pictures and found the entire story of your childhood beautiful. I am a step mom of two twin 12 year olds and they also have a 1/2 brother (my 5 year old) and they to, go inbetween houses (us and their mom). It was interesting to hear your prospective on being a big sister with a big age difference with a 1/2 brother and having divorced parents. I always wonder how that will affect them in the years to come. That is great that you have so many wonderful memories and photo’s as keepsakes. You are right about family, life passes by so quickly, it’s easy to get caught up in the everyday stuff. Hang in there and hopefully time will help.
Jaclyn says
So sorry to hear of your family’s sad loss, Sherry. Aunt Kay Kay sounds like she was a wonderful person who brought joy into your life. I’ll be keeping your family in my thoughts.
Cami says
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family Sherry. I lost my mom 20 years ago to MS, it is a crappy disease. She was only 41 when we lost her. I’m so glad you have such a wonderful family to surround yourself with right now.
YoungHouseLove says
I’m so sorry for your loss Cami.
xo,
s
Alice says
I’m sorry for your loss. Your aunt’s strength during adversity is truly inspiring. She must have died with such peace knowing she was so loved. May God bless you and your family during this time of grief.
Di says
What a lovely tribute to your aunt.
Only an Aunt can give hugs like a mother can keep secrets like a sister and share love like a friend…